for me,

empty

i feel like life has been a little funny.
they nip and nip at my hope, laughing at me from their safety dome.
ripping my heart out under my sleeve, they make a joke out of me.
when has love ever been kind to me?
sure, i've had many wonderous moments when i was happy in love.
smiles and butterflies, lingering touches; those late night cravings.
but has one stayed?
has one ever fought for me?
has one ever asked God, "please please don't make her go away"?
maybe it is my curse.
maybe my life will forever be written by jokesters, one that will never take me seriously in love.

i have nothing to cry about now.
i have nothing to chase, or seek.
i have nothing to mull over.
no one to worry about, no one to dream a future with.
they've all gone away.
not one could be certain of me, less the one i want.
it is my tragedy, my foe.
to love so deeply those that i cannot have.
to crave so heavily arms that will never wrap around me.

and i let it go.
i let it all go.
what is there to hold onto anyway?