The End | {BOOK 5}

34| Dark Kaia

It turned out the thing that killed Kaia... was Kaia. When Jody, Sam, Dean and I arrived at the spot in between the crime scenes to investigate, she showed up and attacked us using a long, two pronged spear before running off. I hung back with Jody as we trailed after Sam and Dean, following the tracks the Kaia look-alike left behind.

"So, how are you holding up?" Jody asked me quietly.

"Peachy," I replied.

We stopped a few feet away from the brothers as Dean crouched down to look for more tracks.

"Ellie, Sam and your mom told me how you holed up in your room while we were looking for Dean. You don't have to lie to me."

"I'm fine, Jody," I insisted. "Really."

"It's just... since you arrived you and Dean have barely even glanced at each other," she pointed out. "If you wanted to talk about it..."

"I said I'm fine," I snapped.

Sam glanced back at us following the little outburst, but I ignored him. Dean didn't even bother reacting, instead straightening up and muttering something to Sam before continuing on. A few minutes later, Sam and I had switched spots so I was walking with Dean and he was back talking with Jody. Dean and I, however, were both quiet as we walked.

"What did Jody mean, 'does that mean Ellie's up and about'?" he finally broke the silence.

"Nothing. It's not of import."

"Yeah, okay, Cass," Dean rolled his eyes. "Seriously, though, what were you doing while everyone was looking for me?"

"Why don't you ask Sam? Or my mom? Or Jody? Or literally anyone else who was looking for you during those three weeks?"

"Because I'm asking you."

Dean grabbed my arm, forcing me to stop and look at him. He gave Sam and Jody a look, signaling them to continue on ahead and let us catch up in a sec.

"Come on, Ellie Bear, talk to me."

I opened my mouth, taking a deep breath in preparation to speak, and then clamped my mouth shut once more. Chewing on my lip, I began twisting my wedding ring around my finger, looking down at the forest floor.

"Okay, where's the girl who yelled at me back at that church and how do I get her back?"

"You want me to yell at you?" I asked quietly, smirking up at him.

"I'd take that over whatever this is," he admitted. "I want to know what happened to you after I said yes."

"You want to know what happened to me?"

"Yes, I do."

"Well, let's see. The second you flew off to stop Lucifer, I broke down and didn't stop sobbing for a week. Once I did, I completely shut down and was just numb for the remaining two weeks. I didn't speak, I barely ate anything, what little sleep I did get was broken up by nightmares of you saying yes over and over again. I broke, Dean. You broke me."

Dean's eyes were wide in surprise, his mouth slightly agape as he stared at me in shock. I shook my head, not saying another word as I turned on my heel and headed off in the direction Sam and Jody disappeared in.

⁘

"What are you?" Jody asked.

We'd caught up to Kaia's double, tying her up inside the cabin where she was camped out.

"If you're asking if I'm the girl you knew, your Kaia: No."

"Then what?" Sam asked. "You're from over there, right?"

"You know I am," she replied.

"So you're Kaia's double, hm?" Dean hummed. "Like bad Cass or new Bobby?"

"What I was to her, she was to me. You can never understand."

"Why did you kill her?" I asked.

"That was an accident," Dark Kaia admitted. "I was tryin' to kill the blonde."

"Alright. How did you cross over? How did you open a rift?" Sam questioned her. "Okay, why are you here?"

"You mean right here? 'Cause of him."

She nodded over at Dean.

"Yeah: not him, not Michael, not anymore."

"I know," she smirked, "you're much weaker."

"Maybe, but you're still scared," Dean shot back.

"Not of you, of them. The monsters he sends after me. Every time I slow down, there's more. There's always more."

"Guys, we should move," Jody piped up. "Let's take her to the station just to be safe."

"No," Sam shook his head.

"We need to break her, right here, right now," Dean added.

"'Break her'?" Sam echoed and I flinched. "What do you mean: 'break her'? For what?"

"He wants to know where I hid my weapon," Kaia explained, "that's all he wants. That's what this is all about."

"Dean, what... you're gonna hurt her, torture her?" Jody asked.

I could feel myself shaking, breathing becoming more shallow and rapid as I began to have one of my panic attacks.

"That pig sticker she's hiding, it is the only thing that we know that hurts Michael," Dean growled. "I'm gonna do whatever it takes."

I took several steps back until my back was against the wall, slowly sinking down to sit on the floor with my knees drawn up against my chest while I hyperventilated. Jody noticed while Dean began threatening Kaia and came over to me.

"Ellie?" she asked quietly. "Ellie, look at me."

My eyes darted in between hers, and I flinched as Dean yelled at Kaia.

"Ellie, I need you to take some deep breaths for me, okay?" Jody continued gently. "Just focus on me. Breathe in through your nose for four."

I did as she said.

"Okay, now hold it. And out through the mouth for six. Good. Again. In for four, hold it, out for six."

She continued coaching me through the exercise, encouraging me to focus on her instead of what was happening on the other side of the room, until I was breathing normally again.

"You're no different than him," Kaia was telling Dean. "Threats, violence, anything to get what you want."

"I am nothing like him," Dean snarled.

"Yeah, you are: you always have been! I saw what you did to her. When you got angry, shoved your gun in her face..."

I swallowed, remembering how Dean had made Kaia get into the Impala when we first met her.

"How d'you know about that?" Dean asked.

"Wait a second, you're a dream walker, too?" Sam realized. "Your powers, they connected you."

"Our whole lives, what she saw, I saw. I know where it comes from, your anger, your impatience: it's fear. You're scared and you're weak."

"Alright, shut up!" Dean snapped.

"Michael hurt you. He hurt me, too."