Author's Note (Published under Cloak Pop Fiction)

Kabanata 22

Warning: This chapter contains suicide. This may be uncomfortable for some readers so please, be advised. Prioritize one's state of mind all the time. Thank you.

"YEAH. They're right. It was my fault."

"My Noa, please, stop. It's not your fault. You didn't do anything wrong." Kaunti na lang at tutulo na ang mga luha niya sa mga mata habang pinagmamasdan ang manunulat na nasa kama. Gabi na pero hindi pa rin ito natutulog. Or rather, she couldn't sleep. Yakap-yakap nito ang sariling tuhod at panay ang pagbulong sa sarili. Matapos nang nangyari kanina, hindi pa rin nito magawang iangat ang sarili.

"Why did I even think of living again?" Mapakla itong tumawa. Umagos ang luha nito sa mga mata at hinila ang sariling buhok. "I can never escape them. I can't . . . H-hinding-hindi nila ako lulubayan."

Ang ginawa ni Asnael at Azaliah ang naging dahilan para muling maalala ni Noa ang mga mapait nitong alaala. She tried living. She tried smiling again. And when she thought she was already healed, the people who caused her pain showed up again and tortured her once more.

And this was more than painful. Takot na si Noa. Takot na takot na itong bumalik na naman sa mga pinagdaanan dati. Takot na itong balikan pa ang sakit.

She didn't want another cycle of pain.

"I'm tired . . ."

Morning came and another doorbell crashed on her gate again. Hindi nakatulog si Noa. Magang-maga ang mga mata nitong umalis sa kama at nagtungo sa labas.

"Noa, stop." Adamas tried reaching her arm, but he just passed through. And it was more frustrating than before because he knew he was nearing to see the end.

Binuksan ni Noa ang gate at niluwa roon si Azure at Asnael.

Hindi nagbago ang ekspresyon ni Noa at nanatili lang blangko. Pagod na itong magpakita pa ng kahit anong reaksyon.

"You look wasted, Noa. Care to say at least hi to me?" Azure said while smiling sweetly at Noa. May hawak itong box sa kamay.

At hindi maganda ang kutob ni Adamas sa laman n'yon.

"Mukhang wala yata sa sarili si Noa," natatawang sabi ni Asnael. "Might as well give it to her quick. I'm kind of getting scared because of her face. Pfft. Scary."

Natawa rin si Azure. "Poor you. I hope you'll heal soon, Noa. And as a token of apology for what I did to you years ago, here take it. I was wrong for doing that and I'm really, truly regretting it."

Adamas clenched his fist. The damn man was clearly being sarcastic. He was mocking Noa.

Wala naman sa sariling tinanggap iyon ni Noa.

"Hope you'll like it." Tumalikod na ito at nakapamulsang nagtungo sa kotse.

Sumunod naman si Asnael pero bago pa man ito makalayo biglang hinawakan ni Noa ang braso nito.

"What?" He looked at her with disgust. "Didn't I tell you not to touch me?"

"I will kill . . ."

"Huh? What did you say?" Kumunot ang noo nito. Bahagya itong yumuko para marinig ang sinabi ng nakayukong si Noa.

Inangat ni Noa ang tingin. Sumilay ang ngiti nito sa mga labi bago nagsalita. "I will kill myself today. I just thought it would be nice to tell you. I hope all of you will rot in hell when I die. I hope somebody will punish you all and made you feel what I felt."

Napataas naman ang kilay ni Asnael pero kaagad ding tumawa. "You are the one who will rot in hell." Inalis nito ang pagkakahawak ni Noa. "Good luck killing yourself, murderer. I'm rooting for your success."