Infinite (buckynat/winterwidow)

Bonding

"Nat! Thank god!" Wanda exclaimed as she ran to hug Natalia when she and James returned.

"These weirdos have been peppering us with questions. It is incredibly annoying," Pietro sighed.

"Hey, it's called bonding," Steve said. "In fact, we should spend time together for the whole day today."

"That sounds like a mouthful," James muttered.

Natalia snorted. "Je n'ai aucun intérêt à créer des liens avec une bande de connards," she said in French. (I have no interest in bonding with a bunch of hicks)

"Their fashion isn't that bad," Wanda suggested.

Natalia frowned. "Bonding it is."

*****

"Alright. Let's play a game," Clint said. "You all have heard of never have I ever, right?"

Everyone nodded.

"Okay, we'll start with me."

Clint thought for a moment before thinking. "Never have I ever gone to Disneyland."

Everyone stared at him.

"What? I assumed Natalia and Barnes never went before."

"Idiot," Natalia mumbled. "Never have I ever punched a guy who assumed I never went to Disneyland."

Clint gulped.

James smirked. "Never have I ever lost an arm and replaced it with a metal one."

"Never have I ever gotten my powers from the mind stone," Wanda said, looking bored.

"The mind what?" Bruce asked in confusion.

"Never have I ever killed three people by accident," Pietro continued.

"Never have I ever stabbed a guy in the eye and donated his body to an auction," Natalia added.

"Never have I ever shoot a guy in the war and see the bullet come out from the other," James said.

"Hey! We're not even going in order anymore——" Tony said.

"Never have I ever punched a guy so hard that he went blind," Natalia said.

James gave her a mischievous look before continuing, "Never have I ever bombed a park in Chicago and found the target and shot him before using a knife to——"

"Okay, we get it," Steve interrupted. "You guys don't like this game."

"Nein," (no) Natalia sighed in German. "We want to spar."

"What?"

"Sparring.  du weißt?  wenn Sie gegeneinander kämpfen, um zu sehen, wer besser ist, oder um zu trainieren?  Manchmal ist es freundlich, aber meistens ist es bis zum Tod, denke ich," sparring. you know? when you fight each other to see who is better or to train? sometimes it's friendly but most of the time it's to the death I think) James explained.

"I don't know German, but I know what sparring is, thank you," Steve said hurriedly. "That's how you were raised? I mean......sparring instead of playing Uno, or Monopoly?"

"We don't play American games," Natalia replied.

"Uno isn't by an American," Bruce argued. "Is it?"

"Merle Robbins (September 12, 1911 – January 14, 1984) was an American barber from Reading, Ohio who invented the card game UNO," Natalia countered. "In 1971, he invented UNO to resolve an argument with his son Ray, a teacher, about the rules of Crazy Eights. The original decks were designed and made on the family dining room table. Then he and his family mortgaged their home to raise $8,000 and created the first 5,000 UNO decks to sell. At first, he sold them out of his barber shop, while his son Ray handed them out to his students. In 1972, he sold the rights to UNO to International Games for $50,000 plus royalties of 10 cents per copy."

Bruce blinked. "What, you just memorise all the facts in the world?"

"It's my job," Natalia said flatly. "To know the history of different countries. My friends who didn't are all dead."

"Whoa," Tony whispered.

*****

"This is impossible," Clint cursed as he drew four cards from the deck. "You can't keep winning in Uno!"

Wanda raised a brow. "No?"

"No! You must be reading our minds!" Clint accused.

"Without solid proof I'm afraid you can't accuse me of anything," Wanda clipped as she set down a card. "Uno."

"This is actually not bad," Pietro remarked. "If the iron guy wasn't here, of course."

"Let's try to be nice," Natalia reminded him. "It's not like I want any of them here. I could be in a house in the suburbs living with James and you two forever."

"There goes our peaceful future," James sighed as he put down a card. It skipped the turn of the person next to him.

"Oh man," Steve groaned. "Not again."

And so they continued to play bonding games for the rest of the day.