Forever His Princess

-seven-

AMARI ROUSSEAU

"Are you angry at me?" Manny asked as I pulled up outside the house.

"I'm disappointed that you didn't listen to me after we had that conversation."

"I'm sorry."

"I know you are, baby. Sometimes you have to show people you're sorry too or it just seems meaningless." He nodded.

"Is that why you're crying, because you're disappointed in me?" I hate having him see me cry, I don't want him to see me like this.

"No, no, of course not. Come here." I wiped my tears before reaching over to unbuckle his seatbelt and sit him on my lap. "I'm just a little bit upset, that's all."

"It's ok to be upset, you don't have to be happy all the time. Sometimes I get upset too." He whispered as he wiped away my tears.

"Yeah? Why do you get upset, baby?"

"Because we don't have the same family as everyone else. All of my friends have a mum and a dad. I don't have a dad like them." My lip quivered and I bit it, trying to stop more tears from flowing. "But I always feel better when you give me a big hug. Do you want one?"

"A big hug?" He nodded. "Yeah, I would love one right now." Manny wrapped his little arms around me and squeezed me as tight as he could. "Thank you." I whispered.

"I love you."

"I love you too, baby."

—

We went back inside and he helped me pack away the shopping. Well, I say he helped, he actually picked up two things, told me his arms were tired and then went to watch tv.

I started making pasta and thought to myself whilst I did so.

I can't believe I saw Nikolai. And I can't believe he said that shit, the audacity of that man.

I sighed. But he didn't know, he couldn't have because I didn't tell him.

I can't even get that night we spent together out of my head too and I'm sure he knew it. I felt there was a connection between us but I don't have the time to be exploring that. I have a son to raise, I can't be dating people.

Or am I just saying that because I'm scared. Ugh, I can't keep using Manny as an excuse.

I should speak to him. But I won't see him again and he probably won't want to see me after I yelled at him like that.

I should at least try though, right? Maybe I should go to his house. Ugh, I don't remember how to get there. It's not like I was even paying attention to the route, I was literally giving him head on our way there.

I could ask Olivia to get his number from Silas or even get their address.

You know what, no. I fucked up, I just have to suck it up and deal with the consequences of my actions. I'll sort it out but I'll do it after my interview. That needs to be my main priority right now.

Ace the interview and then worry about Nikolai.

"Hey, Mar." Olivia said, startling me, making me spill boiling water on my arm. I yelled out and ran to the tap to run it under cold water. "Shit. Why'd you get scared like that?" She asked as she turned off the stove.

"I didn't know you were here." I sighed.

"Mar, that looks bad, maybe you should get it checked out."

"It's fine, don't worry. It doesn't even look that bad. See, it's a minor burn." I said, showing it to her.

"Yeah, I don't want to see it."