fingers crossed

transatlantique

*laaaaaaav a bit of Beruit even if its a bit of an old man band, get transatlantique on :)*

DIANNE'S POV

Everything just seemed to fall into place after that. Joe and I haven't discussed our relationship any further this week, partly because everything is going so perfectly but also partly because of that lingering worried feeling of what will happen when we leave the strictly bubble. Despite everything also going so well in rehearsals I couldn't help but notice Joe's confidence falter when it came to his characterisation in the paso doble, I tried to reassure him that he was doing amazing but there still seemed to be something bothering him in the studio. It wasn't until monday evening when I confronted him about this whilst watching a movie in his living room.

JOE'S POV

I look down to Dianne's inquisitive eyes looking up at me from my lap, she looks a little concerned. To be honest, despite everything being so good with us, I was struggling with my self esteem a little. I'm worried that Dianne will loose interest in me when I'm no longer her dance partner and we're not forced to spend our days together. Doing the paso today just reminded me of the type of man she's used to dancing with, and I get a bit disheartened to look in the mirror -after watching videos of such well built male dancers commanding the space- to see my scrawny figure staring back. But to be honest I am not sure how to explain this to Dianne without seeming pathetic, but I also don't want her to think my behaviour has anything to do with her, so I try my best. 

DIANNE'S POV

It broke my heart to hear that Joe had been worried about how he looked in the paso and that he was struggling with his body confidence. I'm so glad he chose to open up but I can't help but feel guilty for not being more sensitive about this when approaching the dance because I love the way he looks doing it, he's really starting to embody the right qualities and I wish he could see himself through my eyes. 

I start to share with Joe what a big problem body confidence is in the dance world, for men, women and enbies alike. I apologised for being so brutal in rehearsals but he wouldn't let me saying it's how he gets better. Finally I sat up, looked him in they eyes and told him

You are taking everything I say onboard and applying it, you're an incredible student. And as for your body, yes okay you're not built like Charles, but that isn't what I care about- I'm crazy about you and your gumby figure!

Tearing up slightly he smiles and pulls me towards him, I nestle into his frame happily leaving no space between us. Something passionate and right seems to glue us together and we eventually fall into a deep sleep before even making it to bed.

*****

JOE'S POV

The next day in rehearsal becomes much easier as the choreography becomes less alien and Dianne hypes me up whenever she can. I start to feel so comfortable and desirable when she looks at me this way, I can't help but lift my chin a bit. The rehearsal was packed but the day didn't end there, we head straight to It Takes Two to do have a quick chat with Zoe about the foxtrot and have to rush back to my apartment to prepare for the next item on the agenda. Before Dianne and I get too comfortable in our solitude, Liv arrives to help out with hair and Dianne's makeup for the Pride of Britain awards. The three of us sit listening to my getting ready playlist and laughing together. Once I'm dressed and ready I start pouring the girls drinks and readjusting my glasses and hair until Liv sends me out of the room to finish up on Dianne and let her get dressed. I stand dutifully in the hallway until I am called back in and I stop in my tracks to stop my weak knees collapsing beneath me. She is wearing a dazzling seaweed coloured dress that hugs and hangs off her small muscular frame like she's crafted from marble. Her long red hair flows over her shoulders in such a way it looks hand-drawn, I can't help but compare her to the little mermaid (one of my childhood crushes might I add) with her big brown eyes lighting up as she smiles.

DIANNE'S POV

Joe blushes faintly seems to notice his lack of words in the room and Liv giggling behind me. I find myself quite taken aback too, I wasn't really able to see him before but now I am able to take in how handsome and sweet he looks in his suit, with a strand of his hair hanging over his glasses charmingly. Liv seems to take the cue to scurry out of the room to allow us to take each other in and act a bit gooey.

Before leaving she stands us at different spots in the apartment to capture her talents in photos but I think mostly she just enjoyed getting us to pose together and we enjoy grinning at each other, knowing what an adorable pair we must make.

*

We rush to the event along with Lauren and AJ, who got ready at Elstree after ITT, but only make it in time for the awards so we get to miss the red carpet and media comments -what a shame(!). Before leaving at the end of the night we notice some photographers taking photos of us that will surely appear online tomorrow with some sort of insinuating comments, but I just giggle as Joe pokes fun of them, his fanbase have been pretty welcoming to me and are getting good at defending us and joking about the tabloids.

***

JOE'S POV

Saturday night rolls around and I can't take my eyes off Dianne who looks incredibly striking in her paso costume. Our fellow strictly cast members seemed to notice things between us a few weeks ago -joking around, making heart shapes behind us and filming us napping together- but luckily as we're such a tight knit group they are careful to keep it quiet around the higher ups and media. In more recent weeks when we started being a little less careful they did not hesitate to tease and aw at us at every opportunity which always made my cheeks hot and Dianne grin. 

Being with Dianne I have felt so myself that I am really becoming comfortable in my own skin. As we stand backstage, her tucked beneath my shoulder, I feel protective and strong with my arm wrapped around her. I smile to myself and carry this feeling for the rest of the show.

**

After a very successful show we stand on the stage waiting to hear the results of the show. A feeling of dread creeps up on me and I prepare to cross my fingers tightly  as always, but before I can I look down to see Dianne's hand on my chest, fingers crossed, and she smiles up at me. She really knows me so well. (The next evening watching the results show back we see this was kind of caught on camera which was sweet to look back on haha).

After the show we hang around the cast and crew marquee, arm in arm, smiling as we received complements on our dance. Dianne's hand doesn't budge from my chest for the rest of the evening as we cling to each other tightly.