MY LITTLE ARTIST

TWENTY SIX

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Camila

Watching her drive felt kind of surreal, her soft hands dragging against the steering wheel while the concentration in her eyes kept us safe made my heart almost skip a beat. I didn't care much for the expensive interior before now, but looking over its textured finish had me wondering just how much money she actually made

"How much did this car cost?" I asked, slipping my hand over the seat beside my thigh. She glanced across at me for a split second and laughed "Why do you wanna know?"

I shrugged "I don't really care, I'm just curious!"

She tutted her lips and gripped harder against the wheel "190K, Customised interior and exterior wrapped" she spoke, shocking me slightly as I didn't quite expect such a steep price tag

"It's dumb you blew that much money on a car you hardly drive" I chuckled "You didn't wanna buy your own house?" She cocked a brow towards the road "I drive it a lot actually, delivering to clients and going on road trips with Sam! Besides, I like keeping it back! One day I could really use it"

"Well if I ever get dirty rich like you, I'd buy myself everything!" I hummed "Big house, flashy cars and probably a boat load of clothes!" She laughed back at me with a sweet giggle as we pulled in beside her house "I don't think I could stand living in a big house, I'd get too lonely"

Something within that sentence made my heart instantly sink, my eyes dropping to stare at my lap before unclipping my seatbelt from around my hips "I kind of like being lonely" I admit "At least I know where I'm at"

Lauren got out the car and offered me a sympathetic look I quickly ignored "Meaning?" She probed

I followed her up the stairs with a sigh "It just means I don't have to rely on anyone to be there for me. If I'm on my own there's no chance of  disappointment" I could tell her to feel awkward now as she unlocked the door and dumped her bag beside the couch

Admittedly it was a bit of an over share but honestly it felt safe in front of her, she didn't judge me and never seemed shocked by anything I had to say "I get that" she chuckled gently "I'm almost the same, I do need at least one person though"

"Sam?" I questioned quickly "He's your person right?" She nodded back with a weak and clearly disturbed smile "Since before I could remember, lately that's been a little hard to manage though"

I slumped down into the couch with a loud thump "Because of me?"

"A little" she replied "But not entirely, we were having a few issues before I even met you" her body sank close but not close enough to touch beside me, her gaze however not reaching my own even slightly "He just worries too much and holds onto grudges like they're lottery tickets"

I couldn't help but laugh back "Grudges really do kill relationships huh" she smiled "I'm working on my whole grudge thing"

She tilted her head to lean against the back of the couch, her sigh filling the room with an energy we'd never shared "Me too, I think that's our problem" her tone was drowning in sadness almost as she used her fingertips to stroke the centre of her brow "Really?" I asked "How?"

"I guess we're just having a moment where neither of us can let go of the past" she began softly "I have my shit, he has his?" Her focus settled into the distance "We're not emotionally available enough to be there for each other"

"I understand that" I joined "It's a lot easier when you don't let people in" my mouth began to dry up "It's too scary to let someone make you feel things"

Lauren

Me and Sam used to be closer than close. Thick as thieves even, but lately things had began to slowly go wrong. We argued more and resented each other's mistakes even despite being absolutely loyal to our bond

When Camila came along things only got worse, he resents that I'm not being sensible and logical in a situation I could never have predicted. He despises that I'm trusting my behaviour and going all out to pay the girl some fucking attention. Now he barely speaks to me, our text messages looking bare with tiny dates sitting above every message

"I'll second that" I laughed back gently "Sam wasn't a choice though, we found each other before I realised how much I hated being vulnerable" I could see the hesitancy in her eyes, like I was completely over sharing when all she wanted to was spend time with me

She lifted her hand to scrape back her long, silky  hair  "I like that you can be vulnerable with me" her almost whispering voice replied "It makes it easier for me to do the same"

I glanced down into my lap with fingers fiddling with the bottom of my shorts "There's just something about you" I admit "I think because you give me such a hard time getting through to your soft side, it makes me feel better about having my own"

She shrugged with a laugh "Equally stubborn?"

"Yes!" I finally laughed "Although I feel honoured to be able to claw away at the tall Camila walls!"

Her legs extended out to lay over my thighs, my hands instantly lifting to stroke the tops of her shins "I still don't get what changed" she sighed back at me "Just a couple of weeks ago you were taking girls home and forgetting about them the next day" her eyes fell away from my own "Now you're sitting here being affectionate and paying me genuine compliments"

My eyes widened for split second as I processed her words "I could say the same thing about you?" I blurted back "That angry girl I met on the first day of school actually cuddling and offering kisses" we were in a strange kind of stale mate, neither of us really knowing quite why we were so connected

She laughed, rolling her head back with a grunt as if feeling caught out "I don't really understand it to be honest" she spoke, forcing me to admit the same "Neither"

"I mean" she questioned herself quickly "It bothers me that I get jealous you know? I know that you have no loyalties to me and that's fine but it still pisses me off when I think about who your next lay is gonna be?"

My shoulders and jaw simultaneously clamped shut before using up every ounce of courage I had to speak "I actually can't stand the thought of doing that at the moment " I admit "It feels gross to me now, picking up a random girl when I could just do it with you?"

Her cheeks blushed into a small laugh "So for now I'm your only fix?" She asked "I guess that's exactly what I want? Not to sound forward but I don't want to touch anybody else right now"

"I feel the same to be honest, we're used to each other" she giggled "It's just easier to unify together" she held out her clenched fist for a fist bump in which I quickly returned the gesture, her head leaning now to lay across my lap "United then I guess" I smiled back "Fuck buddies for the forceable future!"

We spent a while after the rather big conversation just watching tv and random movies, it was almost as if we'd talked ourselves out as no words were spoken while we swapped and exchanged cuddles

Eventually our bodies found a laying position on the couch, me behind with her neatly tucked into my stomach. I couldn't tell you what time we fell asleep, but when my alarm began to siren, I realised we'd slept all night..