Painful Desires || COMPLETED ✔️

Chapter 20

     I knock on the second stall of the restroom calling for Lucas and I hear gagging coming from two doors down.

"Lucas?" I knock and the door flyps open with a red teary eyed Lucas.

"Are you okay?" I close the door behind me and he shakes his head with downturn lips, he turns to the toilet holding his chest.

"Nothing comes out," he breathes sticking his finger into his mouth and gagging. He turns to me with wet cheeks and I take his hand.

"Just breath," I tell him and he rests his forehead on my shoulder.

"I think..." He swallows. "I think i'm going to stick my finger in again," he sticks it again and I take his hand.

"Don't."

"Why?" He blinks looking at me, eyebrows creasing. He steps to me, shrieking as he trips over his foot and I catch him before he could hit his head on the wall behind me.

"Are you..."

He places his hands on either side of my head, trapping me between him and the wall. His hooded eyes fall to my lips and I instinctivly lick them, he gradually leans in and my heart quickins.

I turn away and his nose hits my cheek.

"Why?" He whispers slowly moving his head up, rubbing his cheek against mine. I can feel his hot breath on my ear as he whispers again.

I growl pulling his hair, craining his neck and he closes his eyes. I draw my nose along his jaw, almost tasting his skin I glide down to the skin between his neck and shoulder where I had once left a bruising hickey.

I lay a soft kiss and he whimpers pressing his body onto mine.

"Because you are not mine to kiss." I let go of his hair and his head drops to my shoulder. He rubs his forehead side to side breathing heavily.

"You said...you said I'd always be yours."

"But that was before," I whisper.

I hold my breath feeling his fingers slide down my arm, he takes my hand softly kissing my knuckles.

"Please? Just a little," he whispers.

He looks down at my hand bringing the tips of my fingers to his mouth and closing his eyes. Lightly licking them, sucking on the tips, his tounge slithers up and down them until my fingers are wet with his saliva.

My head rests back, lightly sucking on my bottom lip as he takes my finger deeply into his mouth. Slowly up and down moaning as he bobs his head. I push them in deeper and he sucks harder, squeezing his eyes.

"Touch yourself," I whisper and his hand roams down his own body.

Down to grip his chest, over his nipples he slides his hand to the waist band of his pants rubbing himself. I gasp as he takes my hand, grunting as he presses himself into it.

His breathing is faster and hotter as he grinds into my hand, I can feel him geting hard.

Lifting my leg up between his, his shifts onto it. My hands find themselves on his ass, under his pants and squeezing his cheeks as he whines rubbing himself faster on me.

He gasps as I pull his hair again and bite into his shoulder, he arches his back pressing our chests together.

"It's closing time!"

      The drive back to the university was uncomfortably to say the least as Lucas and Rosa made out in the back.

When the bartender kicked us out of the stall he was suprised to see us, but not as surprised as he was when Lucas smashed his lips onto Rosa's.

I wish I was drunk, maybe then I wouldnt feel so guilty for earlier.

"Come on," Rosa giggles pulling on lucas open shirt, his belt is loose around his hips as he follows her out. They run into the building, laughing and barely being able to keep their hands off each other.

I don't know how long I've stayed in the car, but I can't seem to drive. It's two a.m and im looking at the photo Rosa posted on instagram. It's the four of us, but only her and Marcus are looking straight at the camara. Captioned:

Love double dates with Marcus and Arlo #Marlo #Rocus

I just met this girl and she made a ship name, that's odd. I click her story to find a video of Marucs singing on the stage and pointing at me, she screams, "They're so cute!"

My phone almost slips out of my hand as it buzzes Marcus's name. I hesitantly put it to my ear.

"Arlo?" He whispers. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," I sigh. "Did you get home safe? Did your sister pick you up?"

"Yeah, and I'm so sorry. I shouldn't have kissed you like that, and I shouldn't have accused you of anything." He sighs.

"Yeah...don't ever do that again."

"I won't, I promise. I just got so jealous and...insecure."

"Why?"

I didnt see it before, but I know why.

"I don't know...You're different with him. I just wanted--want, you to be that way with me."

"You're my boyfriend Marcus, and he's my...friend. My roommate." I repeat the same words I used before, wishing that it was just that. I have to forget my feelings for Lucas, he obviously doesn't want me the way I want him or he would talk to me. He would at least not pretend to ignore all of this. A part of me is angry at him, a part of me feels like he's being cruel which is something I never thought I'd feel.

"Is your sister there?" I turn the car on driving toward his apartment.

"No, she's out. Why? A-are you coming over?"

"Yes, and Marcus."

"Yes?"

"Shower. I want you clean from every hole."

      Staring at the ceiling, my eyes feel dry as I blink. I couldnt sleep after what happened last night.

I rushed into his apartment with fire in my veins, jumping onto him and sticking my tongue in his mouth. His hands roamed my ass and I tighted my legs around him, we fell onto his bed and I shifted on top of him.

"Take your pants off right now, and turn around."

His eyes widen and I kissed him deeply, gradually taking his pants off. He turns around with a shaky breath.

Squeezing my eyes at the memory I glace at Marcus cacooned in a blanket, he hasn't moved for hours.

"Are you okay?"

He stiffly turns to look at me. "Let's never do that again, okay?" His voice is raspy.

"Okay," I nod. "Does your..." I look down to his lap and he nods.

"I'm sorry for hurting you."

His lips twitch looking away.

"Was it...me? Was I too rough?"

He visibly swallows, "It's just not for me."

I take care of him the rest of the day, cooking and pampering him where he could barly look at me. I felt even more guilty as he winced when he walked to the bathroom for a bath.

I glance up at him as he pokes the water, making a small ripple his eyes connect to mine and we burt out laughing.

He splashses water at me, groaning into his hands. "Let's just move on, from this. Okay?"

"Okay," I nod.