Forbidden Desires {Ziall AU}

Chapter 3: breathe one, two, three, take all of me

chapter title from Rush by Troye Sivan

Sorry for the delay, I was procrastinating writing this chapter if I'm being honest.

And sorry in advance if there isn't an update for another few weeks, I have an exchange student staying with me for a few weeks soon and I'm not sure how much time I will have to write. There might be another update within the next week or so, but if not there probably won't be one until March.

This is getting fucking ridiculous; I can't get him out of my head, and I have no idea why. I don't think I've gotten a good night's sleep in at least a week. The blond lad keeps on slipping into the thoughts no matter how hard I try to push him out. His constant gaze not helping in the slightest. It's been three weeks, and I take it he hasn't said anything to anyone. No one gives me a second glance in the hallways. Thank god, you don't want to earn a reputation in this place. As soon as you have a name, you become a target. I'm hoping that he keeps our unspoken agreement. I don't need anyone in the school thinking I'm gay because I'm not. I'm straight, I was just letting off some steam with him. And besides, it was only one time.

"Mr Malik," the voice drawls, bringing me out of my thoughts. I look up to meet my teacher's eyes, standing at the edge of my desk, looking down at me. "Care to share your thoughts with the class?"

I smirk, "Don't ask questions you don't want the answers to." Imagine what they would think if I told them I was thinking about the guy I fucked a few weeks back.

They clench their jaw, but as they open their mouth the depressing trill of the bell rings through the air. I jump up from my seat, stalking out of the classroom before they have a chance to call me back. I walk through the hallway alone, for once appreciating the solidarity.

I try to focus on walking to the cafeteria, but the blond boy keeps wandering past the walls of my mind. I can't keep going on like this. He's driving me crazy and I barely know anything more than his name. It doesn't help that he stares at the back of my neck anytime we're in the same room. I have to do something about it. I bring my gaze up from the floor to see the very same blond standing alone at a locker. He looks around, his gaze resting on mine. I walk towards the storage cupboard down the hall, motioning for him to follow. When he joins me in the cupboard, he's folded in on himself, and his face is pale. He almost looks like a ghost.

I pace the length of the room, running my hands through my hair. Honestly, I didn't think about what I was doing. I tend to not think when it comes to him. I just do.

"Always wanted to fuck in a closet."

I freeze because what? That was the last thing I would have expected to come out of his mouth. But again, I don't know the guy at all, so who am I to judge? How am I even meant to react to that? "Shut up," I mumble, shoving him against the wall. What am I even doing anymore? He looks more confident now, but I can still see the anxiety lingering in his eyes. "What the hell do you think you're doing."

He grins at me, "What do you mean?" He pays no mind to the fact that he is completely and utterly defenseless. His arms pinned down at his sides, yet he has a cocky smile on his face.

"Like you don't already know." I scoff, gripping his shoulders harder.

Silence.

I sigh, looking down at the space between us. "Why the fuck are you staring at me all the time." I try, hoping that his thick head will finally get the hint.

He smirks, rolling his view over my face before settling on my eyes. "Just admiring beauty, something wrong with that?"

I glare at him, struggling to keep my eyes on his blue ones. How forward can this guy get? I'm not even into men for Christ's sake.

"I mean, have you looked in the mirror lately?" he continues, eyes rolling over my face again, this time settling on my lips. He looks very at ease, considering the look that I must be sporting on my face right now.

I scoff, shaking my head. "You really have no shame, do you?"

He shrugs, "Nope" he manages to move closer to me until our faces are only inches apart.

I roll my eyes, shoving him harder against the wall if that's possible. I press my knee between his thighs, his legs immediately parting for me. "That's going to get you in trouble one day."

"Already has." He smiles.

He's still staring down at my mouth, so I take the opportunity to stare down at his. I remember how amazing he felt pressed against me, his body arching into mine. I don't blink, I can't. I wonder for a moment if this is all a crazy dream, but I can't bring myself to take my eyes off him. I feel dizzy, and I'm now holding onto him to keep me grounded.

"How the fuck are your eyes so blue?" I blurt out, my eyes growing wide as the realization sinks in. Why the hell did I say that? Oh god, he's going to think I'm such a creep. Wait, why do I care what he thinks of me?

"It's a mystery." He whispers, a small smile now tugging at his lips. It's a genuine smile, not a cocky smirk like before.

I hum, I'm shocked he didn't call me a creep and push me off of him. I surge forward, capturing his lips with my own. He lets out a little squeak, but I can feel him relax into the kiss. He wraps his arms around my neck, pulling me closer. My head is spinning, and a chorus of thoughts bouncing around in my mind. I grind my hips into his, feeling him moan against my lips. It's only now that I feel the slight bulge growing in his pants. A small smile traces my lips, knowing that I can do this to him. I push my tongue in, feeling his hot mouth around me. He makes a small sound, kissing me deeper. Before I know what he is doing, he flips me around, and my back meets the wall. His lips don't leave mine. His hands trail down my chest, stopping at the waistband of my jeans. Skinny jeans are a pain to put on, I might add.

He drops to his knees, popping the button of my jeans. Oh shit, he's giving me a blowjob. I groan at the thought, throwing my head back against the wall. I gasp as he tugs my pants down, his hands pushing my hips back against the wall. He licks a stripe down the underside of my length, before taking me in his mouth. I can feel my eyes rolling into the back of my head, and my hand makes its way into his hair. He starts bobbing his head and I look down to see him staring up at me. I tug his hair, making him moan around me, sending vibrations through my body. He hollows his cheeks, creating a vacuum. I conclude in my hazy state that this is definitely not the first time he's sucked dick. As I'm brought closer to the edge, my fingers tighten around his locks. How can someone manage to look so innocent as they are sucking me off. A string of profanities leaves my mouth as I come into his, and he continues to suck me through it.

He rises from his knees, and before I get the chance to say anything, he's wiped his mouth and walked out the door with a smirk taunting his face.

I stay leaned against the wall for a moment, doing up my jeans and pushing away the thought that was by far the best blowjob I have ever received. When I finally collect myself and walk into the hallway, no one seems to take notice. The halls already bustling.

"Hey, Malik!"

I turn around and see Liam walking towards me, he hasn't said anything about what happened a few weeks ago, thank god. I don't think I want to talk about it, ever. "Hey."

We fall into step with each other, and I can feel him eyeing me. "So, who's the lucky girl?" Liam smirks.

My head whips around, "What?" I choke, my eyes practically bulging out of my head.

"What! You look all sex hazy." He states, gesturing to me. He has a small smile playing on his lips.

"Fuck off." I mumble, looking ahead once again, deciding that I am not going to tell him that Niall Horan gave me a mind-altering blowjob.

Liam laughs a little, "Jeez, I'm only joking."

We slide into the seats of our next class, and the teacher starts droning on about something that I couldn't give two fucks about. Instead, my mind drifts to his blond hair. It's wrong, I know it is. But I can't seem to stop myself.

Word Count: 1486