MadMax

Hard conversations.

    It's the next day and I am in Nancy's room. I do not remember much of what happened last night. El is sleeping peacefully next to me in the bed. Robin is curled up in the chair asleep as well. I'm unsure of where Nancy is. I'm too nervous for these questions from everyone. I just want to run away but I know that I shouldn't. Just then the door starts creaking slowly and Nancy steps in.

"Hey kid, you're awake." She whispers softly, careful not to wake the others.

"Hi Nance."

"How are you feeling?" She asks.

"Embarrassed, i'm so sorry about last night."

"Everything is okay, you have absolutely nothing to be embarrassed about. We really are just trying to help. You can stay here as long as you need. I do think we should talk though."

"Sure, what about?" I ask, trying to sound oblivious.

"Max, has Neil been abusing you?"

I hide my face again and try to think of what to say.

"I mean, it is just complicated. It's hard to talk about." I say stuttering on my words.

"Okay, how about I just ask you some yes or no questions, is that okay with you?"

I nod my head.

"Does he hit you?"

I nod.

"Has he ever touched you inappropriately?"

I pause for a second and then slowly nod my head. I have never shared any of this with anyone but it has been so hard to keep in so I finally let it all go.

"Does your mom know?" She continues

I nod.

"Does she do any of this to you?"

I shake my head. "No, but she lets him do this to me. She doesn't even attempt to stop him. She is just like him but not physical." I feel tears coming down my face.

Nancy comes over and sits next to me. I lay my head on her shoulder.

"I am so so sorry Max, I had no idea."

She sounds genuinely hurt.

Me and Nancy have never been that close but right now for some reason I trust her with everything. She's like a mother figure to me. She cares about all of us kids and will do anything to protect us.

I ask her if I can go to the bathroom and she points the way. I walk into her bathroom and slowly shut the door. You can tell this is a teenage girls bathroom. There is makeup scattered across the sink and just random little things. Among it all I see an eyebrow shaver, without thinking I pick it up. I sit on the floor leaning against the door and pull down the edge of my pants to expose my thighs. I slide the blade against my cold skin and exhale. I do a few more streaks but then Nancy yells out asking if i'm okay. I jump up pulling my pants up and flush the toilet and turn on the sink for a second. I shove the blade in the pocket of my jumper and rush out of the bathroom.