unrequited ➳ (connor jessup fanfic)

II

"You're head over heals in love with me."

-

I sigh. "I could just like personal space." I exasperate as he presses his body on mine.

I barely admitted to myself I may have deeper feelings for him, I wasn't ready to tell him.

"Its nice knowing someone beisdes my mother loves me more than life itself and always has gummy bears handy." He says, ignoring my last statement as traces circles on my hip from where my shirt was ridding upward. I could feel the goosebumps forming and I inhaled deeply.

"Hannah doesn't?" I question, curious, but rather wishing I hadn't. He scoffs. "She banned me from gummy bears because their childish and go straight to your thighs." He says in a mocking tone.

"As long as she loves you more than life itself." I whisper.

"Seems like it. I mean, she's marrying me so she must." He says.

I wanted to say it might be the fact that he was an actor - and actors tend to have money - but I kept my mouth shut on that one.

"You should probably lay on your side of the bed." I state after he moves his hand further up my waist.

Even though I was in love with him, I still had respect for his relationship. I know he loves her deeply, and I'm sure she loves him just as much. I don't want to get in the way of that, even if it means I feel my heart break a little every time her name comes out of his mouth.

After a moment, he sighs and scoots to his side. I move my head to a comfortable position and finally drift off to sleep.

-

I slowly open my eyes and take a deep breath. I didn't notice Connor in the bed.

But I smell food.

That was enough motivation to get me on my feet and walk towards the kitchen.

I saw Connor standing next to the stove, shirtless may I add, flipping something in a pan with a spatula. "Why are you shirtless?" I ask and he whips around, nearly dropping the spatula in the process.

"Uh," he says with an adorable expression. "I got hot last night, just kinda threw it off..." He says in a manner that I would use if I had got in trouble with my mom.

"You could've turned on the fan." I say and lean against the wall. "I'd rather turn you on." He says and flips something in the pan.

"Smooth." I mutter under my breath. Although he didn't necessarily have a six pack, his v-line was eysome to say the least.

"I made you pancakes." He says and smiles widely. I can't help but smile at how cute he is.

I get two mugs from the cabinet. "Just milk in your coffee, right?" I ask and he chuckles. "Yes, sweetheart." He says and my heart fluttered but I still pursed my lips.

"Sweetheart?" I echo while pouring coffee into both mugs. I liked it, yet did not know why he'd call me that.

"I've only ever told you how I take my coffee once and you still remember but Hannah gets it wrong every single time, even if I remind her before she even puts anything in it." He says in a raniting tone. I usually just let him rant off about her, not saying a word. "Then, one day she just said that it was gross that I took my coffee like that and said I shouldn't. I like strong coffee but I don't like it completely black. That's just me." He adds.

"Its not even just that, she doesn't even like reading the stuff I write, short films, scripts or whatever. And if she does read them, she says I should do something else with my life and talks about how I could be a basketball player since I'm tall. I don't even like sports, for fucks sake I barley walk without tripping over thin air. How does she expect me to bounce a ball and run while doing it. I wont even run for gummy bears. Not to mention-" He keeps going. I sit there and listen for a while.

Once he's done, our plates in front of us are empty along with our coffee cups.

"So speaking of your short films, when does Little Coffins premier?" I ask, genuinely interested. His eyes light up immediately.

"Next week, on Thursday. I was going to go with Lauren since Hannah doesn't want to." He explains and I furrow my eyebrows.

"She seriously wants nothing to do with your short films?" I wonder out loud. "Well, she just changes the subject every time I ask her opinion. I just figured she wouldn't want to go and Lauren is coming into town so I figured I'd take her." He says and shrugs.

I wanted to speak up and say that she should be as supportive as he is to her, but I kept my mouth shut. It also wasn't exactly a good feeling knowing he didn't invite me.

But as usual, I didn't say a word. I only nodded and forced myself to smile reassuringly. I started to reach for his forearm to touch it comfortingly but decided against it mid reach.

I notice he furrowed his eyebrows but he didn't say anything about the matter. "I'm sure everyone will love it." I say to break the almost-awkward silence.

"Highly doubt it. Maybe I should do something else." He says and looks like he's deep in thought. I shook my head, "Absolutely not. You're amazing at writing and you're actually good at it, from what you've let me read. Even if I didn't know you, I'd still want to read more or your stuff." I say and he meets my gaze.

"Speaking of which, when are you going to let me read more of your stuff or watch the films you've already shot?" I ask curious. He always left me out of the loop. I was pretty much invisible unless he needed a shrink and I was so helplessly infatuated with him, I simply didn't give a dang.

"Soon, maybe." He says under his breath. He then clears his throat. "I should get going, I need to shower and I have to go downtown to run some errands. I'll call you later." He says while getting up. He smiles, gets his stuff and is gone just like that.

I sigh. "No you won't." I whisper when he closes the door and I start cleaning up the kitchen.

*

EDITED