𖤐⭒๋࣭ ⭑ this side of paradise

Chapter 18

- If you're lonely...

White walls.
White floor.
White sheets.
White windows.
White curtains.

Everything was pure white. That situation felt weirdly familiar.

He couldn't remember much of what happened and how he got into the hospital. The only thing he knew was that moving felt difficult.
Did it happen again? Were they, like, going on a trip in Sweden and got into a car crash? Were Lukas and Matthias ok?

Now he would hear those words again and hardly understand half of them.
"For the parents there's no hope, the child should survive. He might not be able to understand and speak clearly anymore, though". He remembered it as it was the day before.
And as he looked around, he would see his grandmother praying on a chair and Tino watching over him, and a worried Lukas bursting into the room.

As he properly woke up, he scanned the room; moving felt easier. He was completely alone, again. He frowned and looked out the window. It was sunny outside.

He sighed and tried to sit up, but he felt something heavy around his stomach. He rolled up his shirt (...another white thing...) and—

Oh. Now he remembered.
He stabbed himself, hoping he would die.
Why didn't it work?! Why was he still alive?!
Did they really "save" him?! Why didn't they let him die?! He was useless anyway!

The door of the room opened. It was Lukas who stepped in. He looked so upset: his eyes were puffy and watery as he just stopped crying, his hair was messy and he forgot his hairclip.
As Emil turned to him he teared up again, biting his lips.

Em never saw him cry. He was good with self-control, and when he lost control he always got really upset. That was one of his biggest flaws, probably.

Lukas approached Emil, then hugged him as tight as he could, as if he was afraid of losing him. Emil didn't hug him back. He remained silent. Now he felt so guilty, again. Why did he do that?

He wanted to die so bad, but at the same time he didn't want to leave Lukas. Like, he was annoying as fuck in his own way, cold, sassy and also a bit controlling, but Emil was the only person left in his close family, afterall.

«never do such thing ever again,» he mumbled between the sobs, his voice was cracking.

Emil didn't feel like speaking, at all. The only thing he could do was hugging him back, and he didn't.

Someone else appeared on the door and leaned on it...it was Matthias. He looked so upset too, but he was probably just bottling up his emotions as every time.

He waved, smiling resigned.
It hurt seeing him smiling like that. Where was his smirk? What happened to it?

They stayed with him most of the afternoon, chatting and sometimes crying as well.
But then again, they left him alone. It was dark.
The lights were on (they were white too), the curtain closed. He didn't even had his phone, Lukas took it.

Emil sighed.
Why...why didn't he die?
Maybe he had to try when Lukas and Matthias weren't home. Yeah, he had to do like that.
But it was too late.

'Thias told him that they found out that he was trying to k¡ll himself just some minutes after he lost consciousness, that he already was losing so much bl00d (Lukas almost passed out) and that they were so worried.

The next three days were just like the first. Sometimes it was more boring, other times people came checking on him and oh my God, so annoying...other times other people came visiting and brought him flowers or anything cool. Those people were Tino and Berwald.

Three days and he could go home. That week flew away real quick, luckily. He couldn't wait to get back home. Hospitals weren't the best of places; they smelled like alcohol and like old ill men and women.

He felt extremely bored and lonely at one point, when in the early afternoon (something around three-four post meridian) someone came there. He expected it to be Lukas and Matthias, since they always went there at that hour, but...no, they weren't Matthias, nor Lukas.

It was Arthur.
What was Arthur doing there?
The Brit barely knew him...and if he did, it was Lukas' fault.
But he wasn't alone...
Arthur...Arthur and...

Emil couldn't believe his eyes, and he was so confused about why he came. What was he doing there? He could've just sent a message, couldn't he? Not like he wasn't happy to see him.

Dark brown choppy hair, the weird bangs, honey eyes. Oversized bright red shirt, black jeans, converse shoes.

He couldn't help but tear up, stunned, as he sat up.

Why was Leon there?
When? How? What?
His thoughts were running so much.

He smiled. That smirk gave Emil butterflies.
Oh, how he missed seeing it.

«I'll leave you two alone,» Arthur said. In fact, he winked at Emil and left the room.

They were alone.
Happiness striked Em the way it didn't for a very long time, as Leon approached him. He felt so excited, so happy, so thrilled by his presence.
He got up from the bed, even though he knew he should'ven't, and stood on the cold, white floor.

They found themselves face to face, both smiling like two idiots and staring at each other's features in amazement. It felt different, seeing each other in real life. They were so different, still both thought the other was gorgeous.
Emil's light hair, his white skin, skinny fingers and grabbable waist; Leon's amber eyes, his tan skin, the black nail polish on his nails.

«Hey, Em, nice to see you» Leon said, grabbing Em's face softly and breaking that comfortable silence, «listen, I'm, like, sorry for what happened, and—»

Em couldn't help it.
He wanted to do that from too much time, and now that he had the occasion he wouldn't waste it.

So he pulled Leon closer and...
Punched him on the lips.
Softly.
With his own lips.

He was pretty shocked at first, but then he kissed Em back. It felt so cozy, it felt so nice. Leon already kissed numerous people, but with Emil it was different. He was blissed out to be with Emil...

And, for once, Emil was blissed out to be on this side of Paradise.

- ...come be lonely with me.

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Yep, this is the end of the story.
I hope you liked it!

Thank you all soooooo much for reading this, and see you in my next ff!