A Modern Quest for an Ancient Remedy....
If you enjoy a fast-paced read, Five Weeks in the Amazon is the book for you. It's an honest story filled with peaks of humor and valleys of despair. Author Sean Michael Hayes has written a book that many wou...
When I rolled my face off the musty pillow, the first thing I thought about was calling Kelsey. I miss her, I like her more and more each day, and I wanted to hear her voice this morning.
The Karma Cafe wasn't open when I first got to town so I had to go to The Dawn of the Amazon, the other gringo restaurant with Wi-fi in Iquitos. It didn't matter where I went, though, because Kelsey wakes up with the sun just like me. It's one of the things I love most about her. I knew she'd be up or getting up soon—unless she'd stayed out all night partying. It is Tuesday, but anything is possible with that girl.
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She answered on the third ring, and was happy to hear me. It was cute and it felt significant to have my affection reciprocated. It made me miss her.
I'd take a girl who desires me for the right reasons a million times over what you'll find in dark bars on dark nights. Up until now, she's also kept her distance. It hasn't been all me. We've both been hesitant about letting ourselves get too attached, her less than me. I've proclaimed my singularity more than once, but now I'm realizing I truly care about her. I care about what happens to her in life, and I want her to be happy, but most of all, I want her to be my girl.
The feeling is a little scary to be honest, but I'm ready to put myself at risk again. I want to let my feelings continue to grow. Fuck it.
In many ways it's a new beginning for me, which by default, should bring me a new kind of love and relationship. My feelings are becoming cleaner. Now that they've had a chance to detoxify, they are becoming closer to their natural state.
Part of the reason I've kept my heart so reserved is because I've been reacting to all the shit that happened between me and my ex-wife. Back then, I'd loved without hesitation, giving my heart completely. That's the most valuable thing I lost in that relationship: my undiluted innocence.
I'll be coming to the table as a new me, someone much different from who I've been in all my other relationships. If I have a new respect for love, then it stands to reason I will have a new outcome.
***
After I called Kelsey, I finished my cold breakfast and went to the Karma Cafe to finish some stuff I had to do for the website. I sent a few proactive emails, hoping I'd get responses when I come back into town in a few days. After I charged my phone, I left and walked down the street to the promenade.
I followed it until it ended, and then continued to the Belen market for the first time. Before I got there I was hit by a heavy, pungent mixture of foul odors. I smelled the market before I saw it, and it's the smells I'll remember most. The stagnant air was probably close to 100 degrees, and the scent from the chicken carcasses, fish filets, pigs' legs, cows' tongues, and piles of vegetables and fruits flooded my lungs.
