The Ice in my Heart (K/DA x Male Reader)

37 | Desiderium

Evelynn POV

It's not like I wanted to forget Elias, but rather, I couldn't. The memories we shared were the only fragments of a lost life that reminded me of what it was like to be happy. But I often found myself chasing the high of something that no longer existed, a love that already died.

I noticed it almost immediately-the shift in temperament. I wasn't as patient as I was before nor was I as friendly. I lashed out often and spoke in swears. I knew the reason was because I was upset with what happened with Elias. He said to trust that he would be by my side forever, and when I did the only thing that could save him, he turned on me. What use was there in someone's word if they did not mean it?

But I already knew that I wasn't angry at him. It was hard to be when I loved him so sincerely. It was a deep-rooted heartbreak, fear and vulnerability thinly concealed by a layer of haughty detachment.

Despite that, Ahri pestered me often. She let me live with her during her stay in Demacia, and seeing as Orkev and the others had found out where I lived, I took her offer. It was an unremarkable apartment, but it was still miles better than my previous lodging. I slept on the couch while she took the bed in the other room.

It didn't make me any less distrustful of her, though. I hardly slept for I was always keeping one eye open, and I was sure to never turn my back to her. She definitely noticed my distant treatment, but she never pried into it, instead giving me a sad smile whenever she passed.

As the days went by, I learned that she was an upcoming popstar, visiting Demacia to get her name out there. She frequently disappeared during the day to sing at various shows across the capital. Of course, I thought to myself, she was a princess that had everything handed to her, right?

But one night, while I was laying on the couch absorbed in my thoughts, she quietly staggered through the door, her keys jingling by her side with her uneven steps. I could tell she was still trying to be as silent as she could, most likely because she thought I was sleeping.

She collapsed onto a chair by the table in the kitchen. Her head fell into her hands, and her shoulders trembled,  a light, stifled sob emanating periodically.

"His birthday is today," I heard her murmur quietly. "He was supposed to be here with me."

The mention of a 'him' tugged at my heartstrings, seeing as I, too, was recovering from a terrible break up. Ahri shuffled to the fridge, snatched a can of beer, and returned to the chair, cracking it open and gulping down its content. I had rarely seen her drink, the last time being on Christmas when I first met her.

"Our dream is almost coming true, but what's the point if you're not there?" she whimpered.

I felt a pang of guilt hit my heart. Maybe I shouldn't have been so quick to judge her; she seemed like she had her own fair share of troubles. I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep, not wanting to intrude on her moment of vulnerability.

The next morning, I saw her leave the bedroom like she always did, not a trace of yesterday's breakdown. Suddenly, I felt sympathetic to her and remorse, so I flashed her a weak smile.

"Good morning," I greeted.

Her eyebrows shot up in surprise, but she quickly returned my smile with a sunny one of her own.

"Good morning!"

From that day on, I made an effort to at least try to get along with her. It still wouldn't change my intrinsic mistrust, but the very least I could do was not be an asshole to her. I even cleaned the apartment when she was out for the day, trying to reduce her workload slightly as payment for my residence.