𝐞𝐯𝐚𝐧 𝐩𝐞𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐢𝐦𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐧𝐞𝐬 ♥

yellow days

the sky is a forget-me-not blue today, pale and covered in paint-stroke clouds. there's a rickety, old, splintered dock leading out into a vast lake of crystalline blue. a visor of lush green in every corner and the ducks wading in the water look so clean and pretty.

you're pressed up against jimmy's chest, his nose nuzzling your hair, and for the first time in a long time everything is perfect again. almost a little too perfect, but you're happy to cherish the moment while you still can.

for once your life isn't jammed pack full of practice, practice, practice! and a will to do nothing but fall into your bed and be eaten alive by the mattress. for once you're able to relax doing something other than just lying awake at night, moping and dreading the haunting presence of tomorrow.

and all you really have to say for yourself because of it is - being an adult is hard. especially as a performer in a show called "freak show". it doesn't get much better than that, huh?

but at least for now, you get to take a break from it all, forcing jimmy to also. the damned boy has too much ambition and will to work hard than his body can allow, and you swear those heavy purple rings around his sunken-in eyes only get deeper with every passing day.

hopefully this moment will help things, though. today's a day of peace and rest; no show at nine, no practice, and none of the other responsibilities that come with maintaining the fair grounds. it's just you and your boyfriend and the warm breeze that filters through the grassy area.

the two of you are sat upon a patchwork quilt in the midst of a yellowing field. with the perfect view of the drifting waters up ahead. jimmy's cuddled up against you from behind - so close you can hear every hitch, thud, and shudder his heart makes.

both of you hold a glass bottle of cheap beer in your hands and he takes a swig of his own, swashing the bitter liquid around his mouth before swallowing.

his arm is hung loose around your shoulders; body comfortably cradled in between his faded, blue jean clad thighs. you mirror his actions, downing the last of your alcohol before setting the bottle to the side, eyes drifting back out towards the calm sky.

it's been quiet for a long time now as you two continue to bask within the nice gentle weather and each other's resting company. neither of you having the gull to shatter the serene silence first. but after a moment of chewing on his inner lip, jimmy leans forward to press a kiss to your temple. as if he couldn't go longer than a few seconds without showering you in some sort of affection.

"this is really nice." he hums, lips brushing against your skin still. then his chin goes to tuck against your shoulder, a gummy smile working its way onto his face.

you crane your head as much as you can to look at him, nose bumping against his as he does the same. and despite tearing your stare from the stunning and placid scenery waiting right in front of you; you can't help but think that what you're gazing upon now is much more beautiful.

eyes blacker than coal, the cutest little nose, and a single wet curl brushing across his forehead⸺jimmy is absolutely perfect and you don't think you tell him that enough.

then your eyes flicker downwards to find his hands. which subconsciously tighten their hold upon your waist the moment he feels your stare linger upon them. just as you loved the rest of him, you loved his hands too, fingers fused and all.

you don't realize that your mind has wandered off until jimmy absently reaches up to tuck a lock of hair behind your ear; knuckles tenderly stroking your cheek.

but before he can pull away, you're quick to grab onto him. squeezing tight, you clutch his palm in yours, holding it still to your jaw. his calluses are a comfort against your skin, rough and a tell of the many hard years of labor he's done⸺only servicing as a reminder that once again, your boy works too hard for his own good.

as always, the moments like this; where you hold his hand, clutch it tight, and caress the veins with the back of your thumb in absent thought⸺those will forever be jimmy's favorite. how natural it is for you to touch him and his deformity never fails to bring a smile to his face. you don't think twice about it when you hold him close, and that's just one of the many things he's come to admire most about you.

and it's true; you don't care or have to force yourself to touch him. because what jimmy doesn't know, is that his hands are one of your favorite parts about him.

"you know," you grin, feeling the breeze pick up, rushing through your hair. "... i love you a lot. and i just wanted to thank you for taking me out today. i really needed a break and you're right⸺this is nice."

"i love you too. more than you goddamn know." he whispers back. the fierceness to his words has a chill running up your spine; the hairs on your arms raising with an odd tingle.

when most people would assume that you and jimmy are far past the honey-glow cheeks and butterflies in your stomach phase⸺they couldn't be more wrong. jimmy wasn't much of a blusher, but no matter how many times he's heard you say those three special words and uttered them back. he doesn't think he'll ever get over the amazing feeling it brings him.

it's really so sweet knowing that you love him.

and even though the two of you don't tend to say it as much as you should to each other. except in soft, compelling moments like this where all seems right with the world and those three powerful words are just aching against your lips. but even if you don't tell him you love him every day and he doesn't either⸺he still knows. and yet, whenever it just happens to slip out in a second of passion or tranquility. well, it makes those moments all the more sweeter.

his strong arms hold you securely to his chest and yet he squeezes you impossibly closer, dropping his forehead to rest upon your shoulder again. then his nose comes to nudge at your jaw and you can feel him break out into a brilliant grin, fingers intertwined.

with his teeth scraping against your skin, his smile presses up against your collarbones. jimmy feels his heart flutter within his chest while he gives your palm a reassuring squeeze.

and in this very moment, jimmy knows that he would gladly break his heart for you.  

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first imagine i've written in about a month, guys are you proud of me!!!! i'm joking but yeah i hope this is okay. i'm thinking of making the tenses all different so some will be like you, you're, your and some i,me,my and then some will be she,her,hers. you know? 

anyways, enjoy!

ily <3

-abi

26/02/2023