𝐈𝐍 𝐖𝐇𝐈𝐂𝐇, two childhood best friends develop feelings for each other over time, and have to overcome everything life throws at them together.
TOMMYINNNIT!CC X FEM!OC!CC
started: 24.2.23
finished: TBD
published: 17.4.23
WARNINGS: this chapter briefly mentions a character going through a loss. please read with caution :).
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setting my camera up, i sat on my bed after pressing record. it was about time i made my comeback, he'd been gone three weeks by this point and i'd finally got out of the denial stage.
i was dreading it, but it had to be done. youtube was my job, and i couldn't escape it anymore.
"hey guys," i started, smiling. "i never thought i'd have to make this video, but here we are." silently, i laughed at the thought of me saying the cliché line i promised myself i never would. "so, to get it out of the way, my dad recently passed away from cancer. therefor, all the money i make from this video is going to go to cancer research."
i took a deep breath, composing myself. "i took a small break from my social media's, to heal. grieving is hard, and i'm still not back to my normal self, but i can't escape it forever. this video might not be very interesting, but i feel as though it's kind of mandatory. my dad loved to be in my videos, and i know he'd want me to continue."
feeling my eyes start to well up, i looked down. no way was i going to cry on youtube, that would just be the end of my career in both tommy and i's eyes.
"you guys loved him, and erm. i don't know. fuck cancer." i paused, thinking of what to say. "today, i'm not going to really do anything too energetic, because i don't have the energy for that. so, we're just gonna talk. i've had you guys ask me on instagram questions, whether it be about grief or losing someone or just a typical question, we're gonna do it."
"the first question i have is, what's your favourite memory with your dad? god, there's a lot. i think my favourite is, erm. probably when i was younger, about nine or ten. my dad took tommy and i to this like mud thing, we literally rolled in mud and swam in mud for hours. it's disgusting, but we had so much fun."
"next question is how do you deal with grief? er, this is a hard one." i laughed, "everybody deals with it differently, and there's multiple stages. i've definitely found myself to be in both denial and being really fucking angry at the world, but i've gone somewhat numb over time. i don't really cope very well, i've just spent more time with my mum and my friends, kind of took my mind off it. i got a tattoo for him, i think that helped, weirdly."
scrolling through the thousands of questions on my instagram story, i bit the inside of my cheek. i wanted to get all of the upsetting ones out of the way, so the ending could be slightly more cheerful.
"okay, next is what is giving you comfort whilst you're grieving. this sounds stupid, but tommy." i chuckled at my words. "tommy's kind of— my comfort person, god twitters going to have a field day with that. but, yeah, he's been a really huge part of my life since i was four and he's, other than my mum and larissa, the only person who truly understands me right now. he's helped me a lot, whether it be let me cry to him over it, or just take my mind off of it," i rambled, "he's done really good with helping me. anyway, next question. i'm not answering sad ones anymore, sorry."
"what's your favourite vlog on tommy's channel? god, these are all about tommy. erm, i think it's the big drink™️ one, not quite sure why, but it's funny. yeah."
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