𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐑𝐄 𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐒, 𝐭.𝐬𝐢𝐦𝐨𝐧𝐬

15. big kids

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

WARNINGS: none :).

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

for some odd reason, tommy had managed to convince me to join in with his stupid 'tom simons' vlog channel ideas, when a six three blonde boy with a loud voice charges into your bedroom and sticks his finger down your ear yelling at you, it's hard to say no. so i agreed, and pushed him out of my room whilst i got ready.

he didn't give me much warning on what we were doing, he just warned me that i'd get sweaty. with that information, i simply put on plain black leggings with a white tank top, putting a nike hoodie over my head for the way there — it was still the end of december in england.

tying the laces to my classic white converse, i slipping my phone into my hoodie pocket and left the room, meeting tommy again. after speaking to my mum for a moment, we got into the car where jack could be found in the drivers seat, phil beside him whilst ranboo sat in the back, soon to be joined by tommy and i.

yawning, i put my seatbelt on. "where are we going?"

"you didn't even tell her what we're doing?" jack laughed, turning in his seat to face tommy and i.

"no, i never do." tommy shrugged, "we're going to an adult soft play, basically."

"what?"

"it's just like, i don't know how to describe it."

"you're taking a thirty four year old man to an adult soft play? phil, you're going to go into cardiac arrest, mate." i joked, yet kept the seriousness in my tone.

the car burst out into laughter, but tommy glared at me. "don't ever bully my dad like that ever again, valerie."

"at least you have a dad, bitch." i squinted my eyes at him, and his jaw dropped.

he turned to face the phone that ranboo was holding, recording the conversation. "elodie, elodie, cut that part out, please. i don't want to get cancelled on twitter, please."

the drive didn't go on for long, and we made it to the place. getting out of the car, we walked inside, tommy buying the wristbands for us all.

"fuck sake, tom, there's kids everywhere." i groaned, causing him to laugh.

making our way into the actual part of the building, tommy found himself instantly bonding with a child, however the rest of us just knew it was for a bit. ranboo and i wondered off from the rest of them, phil monitoring jack and tommy as if they were actually his children. we'd managed to find a foam pit, whilst i stood and minded my buisness, ranboo recording for tommy's channel. catching me off guard, a random small child ran up behind me, shoving me into the pit of green foamy squares.

"WHAT THE F- HELL?" i yelled, managing to contain my language at the child, 'it' looking about ten. "ranboo, kill him what the frick, man."

"i'm not killing a child."

"oi, kid, what's your name?" i asked the child, clumbering out of the foam pit.

"name's ralph, babes. what's your name?" he smirked.

stifling a laugh, "i'm valerie, erm, i'm not your babe though. how old are you, mate?"

"i'm thirteen, you?"

"i'm eighteen, you are a child, please stop."

"oh, i'm sorry, i thought you were like my age." his eyes widened, and he scurried away, his face turning crimson.

turning to face ranboo, who'd managed to get the entire thing on record, i didn't say a word, shock covering my face. ranboo laughed, and we went back to join the others to tell them my traumatic experience.

"valerie, you look like you've just seen a ghost, mate." jack acknowledged, laughing.

"bro, a thirteen year old just tried flirting with me. do i look thirteen?"

"yeah, you're small." jack teased.

"jack, you're five nine, shut the fuck up. i'm five four, surely i can't look fucking thirteen. i'm raging."

"he literally-," ranboo started, finally stopping the recording, speaking between laughs. "no, he literally went white and said 'oh i'm sorry i thought we were the same age' and ran off, it was so funny, bro."

"no way." tommy cackled, phil just cracking up. "what did he like say to you?"

"do you want me to act it out for you?" i offered, and he nodded, jack starting to record for content reasons. "okay, i'm the thirteen year old boy, you're me. so for background, i'm in the foam pit cause the prick pushed me in it. right. roleplay. names ralph, babes. what's yours?"

"er- what's my line?" tommy whispered, in which i whispered back the line. "my name's valerie, i love children."

"tommy!" i slapped his arm, "fuck you. we aren't acting it out anymore, i hate you. die. i hate you. fuck you. you've peaked. you're flopping."

we spent just over an hour there, i'd managed to argue with three different kids in the time we were there, over multiple different reasons. one was just being rude, one kicked me and one was also just being rude. the fact they were children made me hold back, yet it still made me weirdly mad.

"you get so mad at little kids." tommy said, jack driving into the mcdonalds drive through.

"yeah, they fucking piss me off that's why. just rude for no reason, do you actually think i'll hold back punching a twelve year old?"

"never in my life did i think i would have to talk val out of beating up a kid." phil laughed.

"i wish you didn't." i huffed, crossing my arms and sitting back in my seat.