Nobody's Sorry You're Dead

83

The day went by quickly. Cakes and pies and cookies and breads sold like hot cakes. Sales were brisk, and everyone seemed to be in a good mood.

At the end of the afternoon, Juanita's offerings were still on her table.

Fred Hide had a sad look on his face.

"Hadley, is Fred sick?"

"What makes you say that, Bean?"

"I dunno. He looks like his shoes are too little."

Maury laughed.

"I bet I know what's wrong. Who's Fred gonna get to eat Juanita's stuff, Hadley?" Maury said. "Eustian's gone. I think you were wrong when you said nobody's sorry he's dead. Look at Fred. He looks real sorry. I'd help Fred out, but Hadley, Eustian musta lost his sense of taste or something. I eat just about anything that's not nailed down, but Juanita's casseroles are something even I can't stomach. They taste worse than I don't know what, and they're so rubbery."

"Juanita's cooking tastes real bad, Hadley," Beanie said. "The taste of tar is better than eating Juanita's cooking."

"I know," Hadley said. "But we can't let Juanita know that. It would hurt her feelings."

"Yeah," said Beanie. "Like I gotta hurt Mr. Brody's"

"Come again, Bean."

"Well, Mr. Brody's my friend, Hadley. A real good one. He comes to see me all the time. More than you, even."

"He does."

"Yeah," Beanie said. "He wants to buy my place for . . ."

Beanie cupped his hand and whispered a number into Hadley's ear. Her jaw dropped.

"Beanie, you can't . . ."

"Oh, I know that Hadley."

"It's too cheap!" Hadley said.

"No," said Beanie. "That's way more money than I've ever seen. But I can't sell. I can't."

"Good," said Hadley.

"And that's why I'm gonna have to hurt Mr. Brody's feelings. I've gotta tell him I absolutely cannot sell him my place because of Onus."

"Well, I agree you can't sell your place, Bean," Hadley said. "I mean, I'm glad you're not even considering selling. But what has Onus got to do with your decision."

"I'm a pet owner, now. I was just about to give in to Mr. Brody. He talks really nice to me, Hadley. And he brings me stuff. Miss Avielle's stuff. But then you gave me half of Onus, and you told me when I was thinking of bringing Bunker home that there's a lot of responsibility that comes with owning a pet. I gotta keep a good dry roof so Onus won't get wet when you bring my half of him to visit."

"You are absolutely right, Bean. And don't you ever forget that."