Estranged | ✓

I. do you love me?

Krishna Kunj.
2005.

"you cannot go to America.. you have to stay back for our baby"

The words were the last words for me and I knew there was no way I could ever go anywhere.
I didn't want to be the bad mother.
I was angry. Very angry and hurt  with my mother in law and him.

I knew now he'd come and apologize like my dreams are just pointless and my sole purpose of life is to stay at home, manage the chores and be his wife.

I knew everything.
How conveniently he showed affection when he wanted to.
How he took me out only when his Moti Baa forced him to.
How he probably didn't even have me on his priority list.
I knew everything.

And yet I knew I'd melt the moment he made an innocent face and said sorry.

Love always has a price, and my price was my dream.

Suddenly the advertisement on paper flew down to me from the room outside.
Samar had made a paper plane out of it.

"Do you want to visit America?"
It asked.
My answer was a desperate yes, but I knew there was no way my dream could come true.

And just then the door opened.
As expected.

He sat beside me, trying to act sorry. Sometimes I genuinely wished to snap at him, to genuinely tell him how he hurts me every other moment, how his over appreciation for the girls in his office pushed daggers through me.

How I hated to stay in that dingy kitchen all day!

But I had been taught to remain shut and so I did.

He started with the same apology speech he always came up with.

"You know.. it's for the family.. you are the daughter in law.. you are the mother.. you are the goddess of sacrifice.. you are the viceroy of greatness..", and more such dramatically glorifying words so that I can feel how great I am in giving up my basic dreams.

I just sighed as he went on.

He finished him apology speech and paused, looking at me.

My patience had hit the rock bottom and I finally blurted out,

"You love this family. You love your kids, but Toshu ke Papa Do you love me?"

•••

Character Introductions
_

Vanraj Shah.
31.
An ordinary middle class man who works hard to support his family. An obedient son and good father. Stuck in a wedding with someone who he doesn't deem perfect for himself.

Anupamaa Vanraj Shah.
28.
A housewife who dearly loves her husband despite all the attrocities. Dreams of becoming a renounced dancer, but is tied by the shackles of her family.

•••

This story is set in the year 2005.

Nine years have passed since Anupamaa and Vanraj's marriage. She got an opportunity to visit America, but her visa was purposely hid by her mother in law, husband and sister in law.
She gets to know of it and bursts out in anger at them.

This story begins right after the above events.

•••••