Confidante

the fate and destiny

~~Through tired eyes I see your soul Promise you'll never be alone~~

It's 2:38am, I woke up since I heard her sob. Ever since she came back from the her recent therapy session. She's facing on outside in a curled position, crying. It hurts to see her having her breakdown like this I hurried and offered her my embrace. In return she faced at me but burried her face on my shoulder. 

No words needed. I hugged her back, she's exhausted with the work and crown she carried for the public and the organization. It's been how many nights I witnessed this, in response...I just rub her back till she calms down and until I she fell asleep as I untangled myself and replace it with her bolster pillow.

~~When you need life I'll give you rest When you ask for good I'll give you best~~

The organization decided to allow us to have a day off and stayed in the hotel...I am aware you're improving in your therapy sessions. P'Sun told me that you're smiling and teasing him. I am so happy that the P'fa is slowly coming back...You're doing slowly making tiktok drafts, and wanting to listen to music with me. Like we used to...I was scrolling through tiktok then Heidi called

H: Girl, where are you?

C: I'm at our room... why?

H: Let's have dinner after our live...Is P'fa with you?

I looked at P'fa she went inside the bathroom.

C:She just went inside the bathroom, uhmm..

But before I answered Heidi's invitation. P'fa texted me...even were in the same room?

"Can I take you out for dinner just the two of us. please?"*pleading sticker*

H: Hello, Sis?? Are you there? Why are you smiling , what did you saw? Are you admiring me? Is Heilot sailing?

C: Oh God, No. You flirt. Can I do a rain check? Invite your Tina you won't need me in pursuing her anymore she likes you more than I am.

H: You're such a tease! You just want also to be with- -

I ended the call, P'fa got out from the bathroom.

C: Where are you taking me tonight P'fa? 

I curiously asked. She just busy typing on her phone with her brows furrowed. After she comprehended my question, she stopped and looked at me with a soft grin.

"Uhm... Just wear something casual so people won't notice us. I've booked a place."

~~And once again I was caught off guard ,The best surprise is when you gave your heart~~

We arrived to a familiar place a certain rooftop bar where we had our bar hopping with the MGT. I remember how anxious you were to initiate the hug.

"Why are you smiling?" You asked.

"Nothing, it reminded me how we met here. I find it cute"

You went out first from the van. You extend your hand to reach mine.

" After you miss, you lead the way up. I'll follow."

I obeyed, I went straight up first. There was no people only the clear night sky and dinner under the moonlight. I took my phone out took a photo of the sky. Then with the candle lights all over the place and cream white lights that gives cozy atmosphere. I look around she I didn't see her. As I sit at the corner table the lights went off. I immediately on the flashlight on my phone but a spotlight was directly showing P'fa with a guitarist. 

I immediately smiled when I heard the intro of the song, no wonder you were in the bathroom for a long time today.

You took time to memorize this song:

//You're the coffee that I need in the morning/ You're my sunshine in the rain when it's pouring/Won't you give yourself to me/Give it all,//oh/ I just wanna see/I just wanna see how beautiful you are/You know that I see it/I know you're a star/Where you go I follow/No matter how far/If life is a movie/Oh you're the best part/ oh oh oh/You're the best part, oh oh oh/Best part//

I just enjoyed the moment how you studied and memorize an english song for a day. You also paid attention to a certain interview that my ideal date would be a restobar with a live band. You even bought a bouquet of flowers , P'Sun gave it to you after you sang the song. He just waved in my way and left. You thanked the guitarist and he also left us. The live band was playing on the ground floor.

I just smiled as you came near because you were scratching your nose and the way you brush your hair up it shows that you're getting shy.

"Sunflowers for you...Uhm, they're gonna play downstairs so it won't be awkward. uhmm...The food will be served on the other table near the stairs so they won't be able to hear us talk..I know you're asking why this is happening... Hear me out. These past days, I am the P'fa you used to know, after that interview it felt like I was washed over with a cold water..."

You paused, look down and took a deep breath. I just held your hand and look into your eyes

"It's okay, Phi I'm not in a rush. No need to pressure yourself to open up."  I reassured her just like what she needed that someone who sees her the way she is even in those days, she can't express herself.

You look up to the sky and exhaled. You held my hand began to gather your strength to speak well." I can, I can do it. I knew you believed in me. You were there, I was the one who left you. I'm sorry Nu'Lot... thank you for waiting for me to be back. I'm doing the best that I can, for me , for my family....My dream...and My dad...I just missed him so much. I don't want to loose him that early. I want him to see me achieve the dreams we dreamt together." 

You took a pause that's we heard the food arrives. You just nodded at the waiters and they were gone in an instant. You took a deep breath again. And you look at me with your eyes that sparkles like the stars tonight.

"Whooo, Okay...now, as I'm on my way to healing. Miss Grand was my fate and Destiny allowed me to meet you, I saw my dad's heart in you. I felt from the start you were there for me. You're an angel in disguise. He lead you to meet me...Before I'll leave for Indo..Uhm, I-I just want to thank you for believing in me. I won't let you down. Thank you Nu'Lot."

You caress my cheeks with your hand as you wiped a tear from my eyes. And I finally saw your smile, the smile you used to have whenever you're happy. Unknowingly, I was crying too. I was just so happy. You're glowing now. Just like the stars and moon above us. You knew if I don't talk my eyes speaks...You heard it, as your response you just smiled. Glad to witness this moment that I'm going to cherish before you leave.

"Let's eat."

~~I'll have my you 

You'll have your me

No matter what may come

We'll have our we

And as you gaze at the stars tonight

I will gaze at a star more beautiful and bright

And I wish I could do this forever~~~