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Part Twenty-Six

"Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!" Severus yelled, slamming his hand on the wheel. "Why would you say that?! Why would you fucking say that?!"

Severus sighed and dropped his head on the wheel. He was at a red light and it was silent with no music and he hated it because he didn't want to think about anything. He just wanted to flee to Lily's house and scream.

He wanted to sob, and he did. He cried, and cried, and cried. He cried because he knew James understood what he meant and he felt like he had fucked everything up in a matter of seconds. He felt like he was overreacting, and felt like he was under reacting, and really he was doing both.

He fucked it all up just like always. But this time he couldn't run away from the problems. He wanted to kick and scream and cry and throw.

He was really just scared how James would react.

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You can't just fucking say shit like that and leave! James thought. He had called Severus eight times and none of them had he answered. With a few, he was sure that he'd hung up.

Severus was supposed to pick him up in about 10 minutes. The nurses had sent him out early, so he went to call Lily and rant.

'You can't just say that and run away!' Lily snapped.

"I know!" James yelled quietly.

'I'll call him. I'm not letting him get away with something like that and not explain himself. I— hold on, call me back when you're at the hotel. Mary needs help with something.'

"Alright. Love you Lils."

'Love you James.' And then she hung up.

James was frustrated. He had just found out Severus liked him back- from Severus himself no less- and he runs away? What kind of idiotic asshole does shit like that? He felt bad thinking of him as an asshole, because he was sure he was only nervous, but the case still stands.

The familiar grey rental car rolls up and stops by the side walk. James can sense the impatience and nervousness practically radiating from the car as he steps towards it.

He feels uncertain, too.