My Wildest Dreams

Chapter Fifteen

Harper's POV

After visiting mamaw, I ordered greasy fast food and headed back home. The entire drive, my mind kept wandering back to Dawson and what he and I had to figure out. Even though the visit with mamaw hadn't helped me figure out what to do, I did feel more settled than I had when I'd found myself going there. And sometimes, feeling settled was all you needed to evaluate the hard shit going on in your life.

I'd just passed through the Woodington town limits, just about to my house, when a song from my past came on the radio, teleporting me back to senior year and the one song that I have avoided listening to since the big breakup all those years ago. Not that it was a bad song –let's face it, in mid to late 2000's, Brad Paisley couldn't write a bad song– it's just that every time I heard it, I thought about the look Dawson had on his face as he looked down at me with so much love in his young eyes. It was a reminder of just how naive he and I had been back then, thinking that teenage love was all we really needed. Every time I heard it, I thought about how we had made promises to one another to spend the rest of our lives making one another happy. If only our little naive minds had known what was to come...

Even though tears pooled in my eyes and I desperately wanted to change the song, I forced myself to listen to it, reliving that moment for the first time in years. The lyrics of the song morphed from Brad's voice to Dawson's as he sang about how I was 'everything' to him. I couldn't help but think about how things really were no different now than they were back then. Dawson had told me countless times over the last few days that I meant everything to him, that he couldn't see a life without me, and that he wanted me to have his last name. Only thing different is that we are older, have experienced more about life, and know that even with the best laid plans, something can destroy the perfect little image you have in your head.Yeah, something like the Braves and freaking baseball.

The song was just coming to an end when I pulled into the driveway. But all the emotions I was feeling only got deeper when my headlight swept over the familiar black truck sitting in my driveway.

With a racing heart, I climbed out of the Jeep and walked to my back door. When I got closer, I saw Dawson sitting on the steps with a six pack of beer and a bouquet of sunflowers, something that he knew was my favorite. Even in the low light I could tell that Dawson wanted to reach for me, that he wanted to sweep me up in his arms and whisper all his promises about everything working out. But I could also tell that he was holding himself back because he didn't know what my reaction would be.

Stopping a few feet from him, I slipped my hands in my back pockets nervously.

"How long have you been here?" I asked, rocking on my heels.

"Not too long." he replied, grabbing a bottle of Coors Light from the carton, twisting the cap off. He then offered it to me.

Taking it from him, I sat down on the step beside him and lifted the beer to my lips. Based on how cold it was, I knew he was telling the truth about not being here long.

"I think we need to talk." said Dawson, his words sending a cold chill down my spine and making the beer I'd just swallowed want to make a return trip. It's funny how those four little words could instill fear in someone when they could mean literally anything. Unfortunately in my case, I knew they didn't mean just anything.

"About what?" I managed to say, even though my tongue felt like it was too big for my mouth.

"Us. Our future." said Dawson, shifting slightly on the step so that he was looking more towards me. One of his big hands landed on my thigh before he continued. "I know you said that you needed some space, that you wanted me to make this decision without the worry that you being around would sway me either way, but the last thing I want is for you to do that."