Why Leave Me? • KATHNIEL •

VIII: Grey Eyes

8.

It's been half a year since he left, but I'm still not used to it. Hindi ko parin maiwasang isipin sya at kung bakit nya ako iniwan.. It's like I'm living my life, black and white. Hindi na ako masyadong pumapasok sa school. And I just spend a day looking out of the window of my room, wishing he would be there waiting for me. Even if they say it's hopeless, I'm still hoping.

Fran already told me, that I should start again as well as Gazer told me. 

"You are really crazily inlove with that guy." It's Sam, my happy go lucky best friend

"And stupid. How can you still love that guy? Even though he left you for no reason at all." ..and there's Karen again, can you imagine that? She's like she's having mens forever. Sobrang sungit nya

"Why do you love him anyway?" Tanong saakin ni Sam.

"I don't even know.." I replied to Sam and ignoring all their comments about what happened between me and John.

"So, what reason that made you to still hope that there's still 'you and him' in the end?" Tanong ulit ni Sam. Ano ba talaga ito? Q&A lang?

Kahit na tiningnan ko na si Sam ng 'why are you asking that' look. Pero she just nod, and gave me 'sagutin mo nalang!' look.

"I... I don't know. At siguro ganun nga kapag mahal mo ang isang tao... Dahil kung may rason ka, kapag ba nawala na yung rason na yun kung bakit mo sya mahal, mamahalin mo pa rin ba sya?" I answered.

"Yeah, whatever you say." Karen

"All I can say is.." Kunwaring napaisip si Sam na nakatingin pa sa itaas. "Walang forever."

"Hey!" Hinampas ko ang braso ni Sam.

"May sayad ka talaga kahit kelan!" Ako

"Look, I'm just trying to help you move on. Okay? Tapos ako pa mhahampas sa braso!" Si Sam habang hinihimas ang kanyang braso

"Well, to be honest hindi ka nakakatulong! Ugh. I hate you!" Ako

"Ako pa talaga hate mo ah? Eh---" biglang natigil sa pagsasalita si Sam ng biglang may nagtulak ng pintuan sa room. Oo, nasa room nga kami. Kami-kami lang ang nasa room ngayon dahil lunch break namin ngayon at hindi uso ang lunch saamin ngayon.

Now back to the 'nagtulak ng pintuan'.

"HELLLOOOO!" Grabe lang sya, akala mo kung nasa ibang kabundukan kami para makasigaw sya.

"Hello mo pagmumukha mo, ang ingay mo Gazer!" Karen.

"Ano nanaman 'to, dre? Si Harleen ba hanap mo? Eto oh." Si Sam sabay duro sakin. Sinamaan ko naman sya ng tingin at nagkibit balikat lamang sya.

"Hey badass girl, I wanna talk to you for a while." Gazer

"Sinabi nang 'wag mo'kong tatawaging badass girl or I'll you your names!" I shouted. I was pissed when I saw him just smirked.

"Jerk." I uttered.

"Badass girl." Gazer

"Asshole." Me

"Fugly btch." Gazer. I felt my blood boiled

"Don't call me a bitch, because you're an asshole jerk!" I shouted at him. He replied me with trash talks and stuff that was totally got me pissed so I continued calling his names, at katulad ng inaasahan he called me my names, too.

"Hey easy, lovers! Nandito palang kami ni Karen, with ears open so we can still hear you guys---"

"Shut up!!" Pareho naming nasabi ni Gazer. Hindi na itinuloy ni Sam ang sasabihin at itinaas ang dalawang kamay na parang suko na sya.

Napatingin ako kay Gazer at binigyan sya ng matatalim na titig. Nakakainis at nakakairita lang sya! Ever since John ehem, left. Nagsimula na syang mangulit sa'kin sa mga bagay-bagay na kahit sobrang liit ay ginagawa nyang big deal.

Saglit natahimik ang lahat pero binasag ito ni Gazer. "I'm sorry na, okay? Pwede na ba tayong mag-usap?" I rolled my eyes of what he said.

"Seriously, you would really ask that thing again? We're already talking." I crossed my arms.

"I mean, yung sincere. Yung seryoso." Napataas ang kilay ko sakanya

"Ikaw nga 'tong loko-loko eh. . ." tumalikod ako sakanya. "Katulad ka lang ng half-bro mo what so ever." Pabulong kong sinabi ang ikalawang linya

"What?" Biglang nagsalubong ang dalawang kilay nya.

"Wala, sabi ko oo na! Eto na nga oh kinakausap na kita, ano pa bang kelangan, mister? I sarcastically said.

"Let's go have a lunch together?" He asked.

"How about. . ." napaisip ako, "Hell no?" Bigla syang napasimangot sa naging sagot ko.

"You just said you want to talk, so why do we still need to have a lunch together? Kung pwede namang mag-usap lang." Napaisip sya sa sinabi ko.

"Oo nga 'no.." Napatingin sya sa itaas. Tsk.

"Kung bubuo ka ng isang fraternity---" napataas sya ng kilay at pinutol ang sasabihin ko.

"Pano mo nalaman!?" Gulat nyang tanong. So totoo pala? I'm just trying to make a joke, really.

"Doesn't matter. So as I was saying kanina, kung bubuo ka ng fraternity, you should name it..team ang." Pinipigilan ko ang pagtawa ko pero hindi maalis ang ngiti ko.

"Why team ang?" Parang bata nyang tanong.

"Team ang.. Grupo ng mga timang, kasi ikaw ang magiging leader. Team-ang, timang? Gets?" I burst out a laugh, even Sam and Karen na nakikinig sa'min.

Instead of him getting pissed. He just gave me a 'what do you mean' look. Seriously, hindi nya na-gets? Eh kayo na-gets nyo ba?

"Gazer Pagong!" Asar ko sakanya pero binigyan nya nanaman ako ng mukhang di nya talaga gets yung pinagsasabi ko.

"Ano bang klaseng ka-slowan yan?" Ayan, nagsalita na si Karen na may tonong pagkamasungit, kaya binansagan kong ngang miss masungit.

"Ano ba! Masyado nyong pinapahaba yung usapan na 'yan. Non sense!" Biglang kumunot ang noo ni Gazer at seryoso kaming tiningnan kaya napatigil kami sa pagtawa. Which is ikinagulat namin, dahil ang normal nyang mood kapag inaasar ko sya ay aasarin nya ako pabalik.

Nag-peace sign ako sakanya, pero pinandilatan nya ako ng mata. Mukha syang paminta, ay hindi, bakla na talaga.

"I want to talk to you alone, Harleen. Yung seryoso, walang lokohan." Biglang nag-ring ang bell sa labas hudyat na kelangan nang pumasok ng mga estudyante. Nagsisidatingan na rin ang mga ibang kaklase namin, at karamihan ay mga babae na nakadikit ang mga tingin kay Gazer. Well, what do we expect from Gazer, he's actually good looking, perfect ang tangos ng ilong, perfect rin ang hugis ng mukha, overall he's handsome na akala mo may artista dito sa school.

Nagising ako sa reyalidad ng napansin kong papalapit sya sa'kin at tiningnan ako mula ulo hanggang paa. I felt nervous, and it's not normal for me feeling nervous because of other people exept John. Tiningnan kong mabuti ang buo nyang mukha at ang naging catchy lang sa pagtingin ko sakanya ay iyong mga mata nya, they we're a pair of grey eyes. It suddenly reminded me of something, I knew I've seen those pair of eyes before but I don't know the exact place where. Ngayon ko lang na-appreciate yang mga matang 'yan.

"I'm going to pick you up at after your last period of the class." Mabilis syang umalis para pumasok na rin siguro sa kanilang classroom.

Nagsimulang magbulong-bulungan ang buong klase. While that incident he said he's going to pick me up after class, all eyes were on us.