𝐃𝐎𝐍'𝐓 𝐁𝐋𝐀𝐌𝐄 𝐌𝐄, sam carpenter

thirteen

∞

after the little run in with Gale that morning, everyone in the friend group had showed up at Blackmore Univerity's campus and were seated on the walkway's benches, everyone's eyes were on Mindy who was standing in front.

"listen up, nerds!", Mindy said, catching everyone's attention. "as terrifying as this all is, i'm actually pretty glad i get a chance to redeem myself for not... calling the killers last time. it's fine. okay. the way i see it, someone is out to make a sequel to the requel."

"um, what's a requel?", Anika asked innocently, raising her hand.

Mindy smiled sweetly, "you're beautiful, sweetie. let's hold questions to the end." "Stab One took place in Woodsboro, Stab 2 took place in college.", Sam spoke up, bringing out the facts.

"so we think that the killer is trying to copy the movies?", Tara asked.
"that is one possibility.", Mindy replied, acknowledging her suggestion. "heroes now in college: check. suspicious new characters brought in to round out the suspect list and/or body count: check, check and check.", she pointed at Quinn, Anika and Ethan.

"i don't like this.", Ethan told Kyla beside him.
Kyla let out a small snicker, "don't worry, it gets worse."

"but it can't just be about Stab 2.", Mindy stated. Kyla raised a question, "why not?" "it would make sense if this were just a sequel. but we're not in a sequel because nobody just makes sequels anymore..."

everyone fell quiet as Mindy started building up the thrill of the moment, "we're in a franchise! and there are certain rules to a continuing franchise." Sam sighed in her seat, "i had a feeling." "rule one: everything is bigger than last time. bigger budget, bigger cast, bigger body count. longer chases, shoot-outs, beheadings. you got to top what came before to keep people coming back."

"beheadings?", Chad repeated, quite unsure and rattled about that part of Mindy's sentence. his twin repeated it to confirm what she said, "beheadings. rule two: whatever happened last time, expect the opposite. franchises only survive by subverting expectations. if the killers last time were whiny snowflake film nerds with Letterboxd accounts instead of personalities, you can bet the opposite will be true here. and rule three: no one is safe."

"well, shit.", Abby muttered, shifting in her seat beside Sam, scooching closer to her.

"legacy characters? cannon fodder at this point. usually brought back only to be killed off in some cheap bid for nostalgia. it's not looking too good for Gale and Kirby. oh, and that's not even the worse part!"

"this is the part where she tells us the worst part.", Chad casually tells Ethan, Kyla waving her finger in agreement at her best friend's statement.

"the worst part is franchises are just continuing episodic installments designed to boost an IP. which means main characters are completely expendable now too. Laurie Strode, Nancy Thomspon, Ellen Ripley, Sally Hardesty, Jigsaw, Tony Stark, James Bond, i mean, even Luke Skywalker all died so their franchises could live on. that means it's not just the friend group. any of us could go at any time, especially Sam and Tara."