Shattered hearts (Severus Snape)

Chαρτεr six: sταy ωiτh mε

I refused to come to breakfast that next morning as I wasn't feeling too well, the words he said to me last night left like something clawing out my soul and heart.

Something tugged at Severus's heartstrings when I didn't come to breakfast. The other teachers including the head master whispered among themselves wonder where I could be and what I could be doing.

Snapes pov:
I found myself walking to Irenes office, ignoring the confusion on the other teachers faces when I left the hall realizing she did not show up. Surely they were not expecting the cold hearted professor to see her when I was the one who pushed her away.

I had to talk to her, and I needed to do it right this time after I let my rage out and hurt her even worse. I had to find the right way to fix everything, and I hoped my heart would take over everything, as my mind was filled with guilt.

I quickly went to find her in her office, I did not care if she wanted to scream or yell upon seeing my face, I just wanted to make sure she was safe and sound.

Something stirred in me when she wasn't in her office, and my heart clenched. Every step I took took towards her bedroom was heavy, and as much as I wanted to tell myself she was fine, there was pain in my chest, telling me half my soul was hurting and my bond with hef was too strong to ignore.

Just as I was about to knock on her bedroom door, I heard a noise from inside her room, it was as if a few things were scattered on the ground at the same time, and I swore I heard the sound of glass shattering.

Blood rushed through my veins as I decided to open the door without announcing myself, and I walked in silently, frowning when I did not see her. I believed my brain was making up a plethora of bad things that could happen to her including if she was abducted, but then my eyes landed on the bathroom door and I sighed in relief.

My eyes widened when I heard a loud thud coming from the bathroom. My heart was beating rapidly against my chest when I tried to open the door but it was locked from the inside, and I could smell something that was so familiar to me from my past —Blood.

The scent of blood was not foreign to me, but it was not something I was fond of. The stench of iron bombarded my senses and I could not think straight. I had already been in this situation before, and ended up finding my best friend's dead body, Lily. But what I was feeling before was different than this, and it felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest when I thought of her being hurt.

I could handle a thousand deaths, but not hers, not my soulmates.

No, I could not lose her not when she didn't know how much she meant to me. She was my soulmate, my everything. I would not be able to forgive myself if she was hurt and I was not there to protect her.

I needed to see her on the other side of the door, and at the moment, I was not thinking of a spell or anything but my mind was fogged with the thought of her and what could have happened to her, hence I broke the door and I was met with the most heartbreaking sight in my life.

She was lying unconsciously on the bathroom floor, in a poll of her own golden blood.

Colors drained from my face and I felt my heart drop. I realized that I pushed her over the edge, and she hurt herself because of me. Staggering to kneel next to her, I felt her faint heartbeat and pulled myself together, telling myself that I needed to heal her before it was too late.

"Don't leave me Irene..."

I whispered, pulling her into my chest, taking out my wand and began to heal her. Oh, how I wished to hold her close to me with her smiling in my arms, and not like this, when she was so close to death because of me. I made many mistakes in my life, but hurting her was not just a mistake, it felt like a sin, the one that was punishing me right now.

"Please don't leave me..."

I did not realize I was crying as I held her and healed her. The image of her lying in her blood would forever be etched in my mind, and I swore I would not let anything harm her as long as I breathed.

"Don't leave me... please..."

I muttered again, and again suddenly feeling so alone and scared, if I ever lost her, my world would come crashing down like a paper plane. I wanted to live my life with her now, and nothing could come between her and I, and I would die fighting if it meant I could keep her happy with me.

Panic rose in my chest as she fell limp in my arms, and her heartbeat weakend. My my hand trembled holding my wand tightly until my knuckles became white, not even once did I stop healing her even when it started to feel like it was too late to save her.

"Irene...stay with me..."

My voice cracked, I was heartbroken, and I was angry at myself for allowing this to happen to her. I was losing her, and I would be trapped in agony forever if she slipped through my fingers.

"I can not lose you...hold on...please..."

Her name was like a chant, and I was truly afraid of losing her, and I have never felt such before. She was dying in my arms, and she did not even know that I needed her just as much as she needed me.

"I'm so sorry Irene...I'm so so sorry..."

Her body was cold, and the horrifying scent of blood was making me feel sick. I never stopped healing her as I glanced at her golden blood.

I only realized I was crying when I finally felt her steady heartbeat, and I buried myself in her long ruby hair, crying even harder as it dawned on me that she was safe now. My heart was at ease, but the fear of losing her was overwhelming me and I did not care about anything else as I held her close to me, tears rolling down upon my face. Her soft delicate skin against mine, her hair soft as silk, and the comforting scent of vanilla on her.

It had been such a long time since I last cried, and now I could not hold my tears anymore. The thought of her dying in my arms was painful, and it rang through my head that I was the cause of her devastation.