Guilty

Juliette

"So the two of you are still going steady" I ask Emery over coffee.

"Yeah, we're even in the 'I love you stage' and everything," Emery mumbles as she tucks into a coffee cake in front of her. I smile at her. 

"As long as you're happy then I am happy," I say to her, she looks at me strangely for a moment and then nervously tucks a strand of blonde hair behind her hair. 

"You aren't mad at me because I'm basically sleeping with the enemy right?" She asks me, looking at her coffee. 

My brain buffers for a moment, "What?" 

"Well Josh is Zane's best friend and Zane is like the reincarnation of satan, in your opinion so..." Emery says, trailing off. 

"Oh, no no that's fine. Zane is the enemy, not Josh," I say reassuring her. 

If anyone was sleeping with the enemy it would be me. Except, Zane wasn't the enemy anymore. Or at least, he wasn't my enemy. 

I was hoping to tell Emery about me and Zane in a month or so, dating him might just end her whole world so I wanted to make sure it was a worthwhile thing to tell her. Though, if Zane kept inviting me to sleep over in his dorm room someone was going to find out. 

I already got a weird look from Ian when he saw me walking out of Zane's room at seven in the morning in nothing but Zane's hoodie and a pair of pink shorts. I had to tell him I was sleepwalking. 

"Why are you blushing?" Emery asks me, eyes narrowed.

For fucks sake Juliette get a grip.

"Oh...the guy ordering coffee over there is hot," I tell her. Emery turns her head to look at the man handing the barista his card. 

I watch in slow motion as the man turns around to look around the cafe and I make eye contact with Zane. He smiles at me and then notices Emery watching and shoots her a wink. 

That is just some awful luck. 

"Hot?" Emery asks me, laughing as I sigh and slump down in my chair. 

"Well Zane isn't horrid looking..." I mutter. 

She snickers as Zane grabs his coffee and walks out. 

*****************************************************

"I know you don't want to hear it but at some point, we either pull out of the competition or we'll have to defend Lana in court," Zane tells me as he walks me back to my building after we went out for dinner together. 

"I can't send an innocent man to jail," I say helplessly. I wouldn't be able to live with myself. I'd always known I wanted to advocate for those who didn't have a voice and couldn't help themselves. What type of lawyer would I be if I put winning cases over my integrity?

"What makes you think we can send him to jail?" Zane asks me, reaching for my hand as we stroll across campus.

"Because it's you and me...on the same side. We'll win," I tell him, shrugging. 

Zane cracks into a smile, "Bit arrogant of you, isn't it?" 

"You must be rubbing off on me," I say with a sigh.

Zane laughs, "God your awful you know that? Other people think you hate me." 

"Do you think I hate you?" I ask him, serious for a moment. 

Zane stops walking and shakes his head at me, "No I don't. And I think if you started being nice to me I'd get bored and alarmed." 

"Then stop complaining," I say, rolling my eyes. He shoves me as I shove him back as we walk inside my building. 

"Do you want me to stay over?" Zane asks as we make it up to my room, I shrug as I unlock my door and push it open. 

"You can, you can also ask whatever you want to ask," I say to him as we both walk inside. 

"How do you know I want to ask you anything?" He asks me, shutting the door behind him as he sits on my bed. I walk over to my desk and remove my earrings. 

"Because you're fidgeting, tapping your fingers on your leg is your tell for when you're nervous. I used to study your behaviour so I could monitor you in class," I tell him simply. I turn around after taking my jewellery off and see Zane sitting on my bed with the biggest grin on his face. 

"Juliette Castalia you are just as obsessed with me as I am with you," He says, grinning.

 I feel my face go flush and I shake my head in protest. But it's too late, Zane grins at me like I've just made his whole day, "Oh whatever," I say bitterly. 

Zane chuckles as he lies back on my bed and I turn back to my mirror to wash all my makeup off. I change into my pyjamas and walk towards the bed. Zane, who is now in nothing but his boxers, opens his arms as I slip under the covers. 

"How come you always want to stay the night?" I ask him, softly. I always felt like Zane was more honest with me at night, under the cloak of darkness. 

"Honestly?" Zane whispers and I nod. I always want him to be honest with me. He almost lost me once with his lies. I'd rather suffer in the knowing than live blissfully in the unknown. 

"Always," I whisper back to him. 

Zane shuts his eyes, "I like who I am when I'm with you. You demand the best from the people around you, you don't expect me to be something I'm not but you...you expect me to be a better man than I thought I could be. When I'm with you...I feel like I can breathe again." 

And the last piece of ice in my heart thaws as I fall completely and hopelessly in love with Zane Ivory. His words resonate with me in a way I didn't think possible. 

I don't say anything, he doesn't need me to. I just need to be here, with him. In his arms, which is exactly where I should be. 

***************************************************

"So you'll call me when you get home right?" I asked Zane, leaning in through his car window.

It was an easter break and Zane was heading back to his place so he could see and check in on his younger brother, James. I was going to be catching a flight to London in two days to see my mum. 

"How badly are you going to miss me?" Zane asked, teasing me as he glanced at the directions on his phone. I rolled my eyes at him but my real answer was a lot. 

We wouldn't be seeing each other for about seven days, but knowing Zane he'd bombard me with calls and texts so it would hardly feel like he was gone. 

"When you come back I think then I'm going to tell Emery about you and me okay?" I ask him. Zane and I had been going out for a month now so I figured now was as good of a time as any to let her know about me and him. 

Zane nods and kisses me through the window, "I'll call you tonight, trouble." 

"Bye Zane," I say, waving him off as he drives off campus. 

I walked back inside my building but not before I paused at the main entrance to get in, I glanced at the keypad to get in and sighed. It was broken so we had no security. 

First our broken elevator and now our broken security system, I was going to have to ask one of the teachers about this shit when everyone came back from break.