Teasing Mr. Fischbach: MarkiplierxReader {Dirty} (18+) ✔

Chapter 14: You Don't Understand

"Just because you're having an issue with some of your classmates is not legitimate enough reason to switch you to another English class. It's already far too late in the semester to switch classes anyway. Speaking of class, who's class are you suppose to be in right now? I'll need to write you a slip explaining why you're late."

I let out a groan, sinking lower into my seat and rolled my eyes at my Principal's decline. I knew it wouldn't be a valid excuse, but I had no choice. So I made up a lie in hopes he'd feel sympathetic enough to work something out. It wasn't like I could tell him the real reason why I couldn't remain in my currently assigned class.

Just seeing Mr. Fischbach in the halls early today was enough to almost shatter me to pieces. I could barely even look at the man from off in the distance. I knew I probably wouldn't be able to handle having to be in close proximity to him. Being forced to act as if I'm fine in front of not only him but the rest of my peers on a daily basis, just wasn't something I thought I was strong enough to do.

"I'm supposed to be in English with Mr. Fischbach right now," I whimpered trying to hold back the waterworks. Even just saying his name put me in a place in which would be difficult to try and explain. It was like a knot in my stomach and it took every ounce of strength that I had within myself not to keel over and sob. I knew eventually the heartbreak would pass but what bothered me the most is that looking back on everything that's happened, it left me to feel as if I had been lead on.

I felt so foolish, I allowed myself to get played. It's one thing to have meaningless and casual sex with no strings attached like this started out. However, I had to question how could he be so loving and romantic with me such as the moonlit dance, or candle light dinner? I just couldn't comprehend why he would do that for somebody who in a way, was just a 'fling.'

I sat in disappointment, across from my Principal watching as Mr. Neilson hastily opened the top drawer to his desk, pulling out his personal stationary and retrieved a pen from his pen holder. At that moment the few seconds he spent writing me a note for class felt like an eternity. The clock that hung on his wall was ticking and, it was just counting down the minutes until I would have to stare heartbreak in the face.

I knew the ticking of the clock was faint and barely noticeable unless you were particularly trying to focus on the subtle noise it made. Although for me once the room fell to a silence it may as well have been a motorcycle speeding down a freeway because it seemed that loud.

The look on Mr. Neilson's face as he passed me the note from across his desk said to me that he wanted to help but knew it wasn't something he could do. Not this late in the year anyway. Although I fully understood why he couldn't transfer me, I was still upset. "I'm sorry, but my answer is final."

Leaving Mr. Neilson's office, I took my sweet ass time. I was in no hurry to get to get to English and at this point, I really began to kick myself in the ass. How or why I thought it would be a good idea to come to school today, I don't know. I thought I could be stronger, and walking the halls, I kept wishing I was. I thought I'd have no problem walking into his classroom, calm and collected but, just thinking about being in the same room as him after spending the night reflecting on us, absolutely killed me.

I don't think Mr. Fischbach could ever possibly understand how much he meant to me. In fact, I spent most of the night either crying while listening to sad songs on repeat or shoveling spoon full after spoon full of vanilla ice cream in my mouth in an attempt to literally eat away my emotions. I've never done that over any other guy. This would be one of those times where I'd need someone to lean on, and what broke me down even more was knowing I didn't have anyone I could turn to. Not about this at least.