'tis the damn season

Thirty-Nine: Don't Blame Me

"Don't blame me, love made me crazy, if it doesn't you ain't doing it right" 

It felt like we had been walking forever, following Dustin's compass blindly. Everyone was off in their own little groups talking amongst each other while Steve and Dustin led the way. Even from back here I could still hear them bickering.

I walked along side Eddie quietly, as I felt like I was in my own little world. There was so much to think about right now, and my brain could hardly focus on one point. If we were able to find a gate, that would give us direct access to Vecna, and we'd be able to end this. At the same time, I was scared to find one, because it would give us direct access to Vecna. At some point we'll be going into the upside down, and attempting to kill him. There's no way that would be danger free. I still had that voice in the back of my head saying that maybe we weren't meant to win this time. It made me incredibly nervous.

"You know, it's been a really long time since I've seen you Lauren," Eddie says, snapping me out of my thoughts.

I nod agreeing with him. "I guess so yeah," I chuckle.

I'm not sure I would have called Eddie and I friends back in school; he was just nice to me. But it certainly had been a while since I'd seen him.

Eddie smiles at me. "You were quiet back then. You didn't say much at all."

I shrug, remembering how I used to be all too well. "I'd like to think I've broken out of my shell a little bit since then," I smile.

He nods, agreeing with me. "I guess I don't know you very well, but you definitely have a different energy about you."

I wasn't one hundred percent certain that was a compliment or not.

"I mean, for one, you and Steve the hair Harrington over there are practically obsessed with each other, which is definitely different," He laughs, shocking me.

I can't help but scoff at him. "We are not 'obsessed with each other'. We're friends," I argue.

First Robin and Nancy, and now Eddie? Were we really that bad at hiding it?

Eddie just responds with a deadpanned look.

"Friends," I chuckle, nervously. "That's it."

"Yeah, and the grass is purple, and our solar system has three suns," Eddie remarks sarcastically. "I'm not blind, alright Byers. Everyone else here might be, but I could have spotted your longing glances for each other a mile away."

I didn't even know what to say. Even if I continued to argue with him he wouldn't believe me. I just kept walking along side him, letting him do all the talking.

"I'm just a little confused as to how that happened because last time I saw you, those eyes of yours were not longing for him, they were loathing him. You couldn't stand coming to school because of him and his cocky friends; so forgive me if I'm being a little forward with the questions, but I don't get it. What changed?"

He genuinely looked curious, and if I were him, I would be too. Eddie saw how Steve and his friends used to treat me. Everyone at school did.

Steve and I had decided that we were just going to keep things between us, and now Eddie was blurring that line. Did it really count if Eddie and I hardly knew each other? I knew I could trust him, which is why I felt okay, admitting to the truth.

"It's kind of a long story," I say, eventually. I kept my voice down even though I knew we were far enough away from everyone else that they wouldn't be able to hear.