I'm writing this sitting in the rain. Livi wanted to dance. I don't know why I couldn't let her go on a walk by herself. I wanted to sleep but everything in me was telling me to walk with her.
It's hard to pretend to be happy when everything you love is gone and out of reach. I feel like there's no music left in me how can I be happy with nothing. I'm trying to pretend to be happy, to force a smile. Occasionally there's a moment, but it's gone as fast as it came. Trying to plan a trip you've been planning for your whole life is hard when it's not with the person you wanted it to be with. I don't know why I even bother when at this rate I won't be here to make the trip.
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Eleanor's Journal
General FictionThis is Eleanor's Deepest thoughts. TW// SH and death
