crows of chaos

Wylan needs some stability

wylan didn't understand kaz brekker. he didn't understand the guys intense personality. he didn't understand who he was or what kind of things he might do in his spare time, and most of all, he didn't understand why he needed jesper so badly. wylan knew jesper wasn't ready to go out. he had been with the guy for three days straight and after the promising time when he ate soup and began looking healthy again, things went downhill fairly quick. the actual withdrawl began to set in.

jesper wasn't having cold sweats or fevers and he could stomach some food, but he wanted whatever he had taken. it started as beating around the bush of asking if wylan knew what the drug was. from there the topic became a popular one in conversation, and now it was all jesper asked for. it was strange, though. sometimes jesper was fine and functioning, and sometimes, much like the time wylan was currently living, jesper was begging for the white powder.

when kaz had shown up on the front porch wylan was already overwhelmed with jesper, and then kaz threw on what he did and created the problem at hand even greater. jesper was not ready to leave the house but he was going to have to the next day, and though wylan knew he shouldn't care for the other teen he couldn't help but to. they had spent three days plus the initial couple hours together from the first time he arrived. that was almost half a week crammed into the same living space, and though a lot wasn't spent interacting with one another he still found himself growing somewhat fond of the man. now, however, he was worried for jesper.

wylan entered the house and locked the door behind him. he paused and put an ear to the wood, listening until kaz left his step, then continued to the living room. he pushed the rain-soaked hair from his face as he entered the space, and then adrenaline and panic flooded his senses. jesper wasn't on the couch.

"JESPER!"

without a second's hesitation he was running down the hallway and checking the rooms. the other teen wasn't in the kitchen nor the bathroom. he wasn't in the closet, and thankfully the back door was locked from the inside which meant he hadn't left. wylan then scurried up the stairs as fast as his feet could take him and a breath of relief pushed past his lips as he saw jesper standing near the window, looking out on the street. when he took a step closer he saw kaz walking away from the house and the sadness that had fallen over jespers face, but the emotion quickly changed when the sharpshooter saw the other teen in the room.

"wylan..."

he watched as jesper moved away from the window and towards him. it was like every other time before. jesper would come closer, begging for the drug that held no name, and wylan would deny everything that was said. he wasn't uncomfortable with the situation - just saddened. he didn't mind when jesper flirted with him or touched his chest, urging him to give up the drug he didn't have because wylan knew what he did meant nothing. all he cared about was jesper getting better, not the daze-induced begs.

"wylan, please."

this time, however...this time was different. wylan could usually downplay jespers pleads and get him to quiet down. he wouldn't verbally deflect them but instead ignore the teen until he had tired himself out or switched emotions, but this time wasn't like the others. this time wylan was worried about jesper going out the next day. this time it was pouring rain and the image of the angry sky was framing jesper like a portrait. this time the water dripping from his hair and clothes mixed with the darkness of the room created an atmosphere that called for depression, and this time he could see the pleading in the sharpshooters eyes. this time wylan couldn't control himself and he let a tear fall.

he had learned at a young age to control his emotions to some extent. he had learned to silently cry and keep back the sadness until the moment was over but it had been an exhausting couple of days and knowing that all his work would be for nothing wasn't easy to take in. jesper was getting better slowly but surely -he saw how jespers 'fine' moments had been lasting for a greater period of time- but it was taking too long. the guy wasn't healing fast enough and wylan didn't know how to help. he felt useless and feeling useless made him feel guilty because he wasn't the one going through the traumatic experience.