anew

108 2 0
                                    


What I thought I wanted here wasn't here anymore

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

What I thought I wanted here wasn't here anymore. I outgrew so many people, spaces, opportunities but most importantly myself. I've done all I could for myself. Let's just say for what I want to pursue, I have to seek life elsewhere and that's exactly what I'm doing.

"How long till we're there?" I asked the driver while gripping the back of his seat trying not to fall over.

"Not to fa- actually I already told you I would tell you when we're there." He said turning his head to face me but quickly turning his head back to the road.

"Why in such a rush anyways?" He asked.

Silence.

I could care less to answer such a question that had nothing to do with him. I asked a simple question and all he had to do was simply answer.

Sitting back down, I opened my laptop to a light blue light stinging my eyes from how bright it was. I couldn't help but to get the idea that I could've just looked up how far we were from the place. I closed my laptop without even bothering. I'll just wait till he says what I wanna hear.

"I'm sorry". I said aloud so that he could hear me while I put my things back where they were found.

"For?" He asked, scrunching his eyebrows in a confused expression.

"Constantly asking how long until we get there. I guess I'm excited to see my life there."

"Makes sense, just remember not to chase things that have already passed you. You are more than that, way more". He smiled.

I didn't get it. I don't think I'm way more. Actually, what does he mean by "way more"? I'm heartbroken, soft, always last, not always honest, never promised. I can't be way more than I already am. This is all I am.

I guess he saw me thinking deeply.

"Don't think about it too hard, it'll find its way back to you, and you'll know it." He said looking at me through the front mirror focusing his eyes back on the road quickly.

I'm not sure what he's getting at, but I do know I'll have way more to write once I reach my destination.

*a few hours later*

"We're here" He stared at me and then turned to walk off the bus.

Huh? Already?

"Already?" I asked yawning.

"Would you like me to take you back or are you going to get off my bus?" He said looking at something.

What's with the attitude? Well, I was bugging him so maybe that's what I get. Gathering my things, I walked off the bus feeling the breeze of warm air rush against my cheek.

"Thank you" I said sincerely.

"Lani, I've known you for a while, it's no problem. I'm sure going to miss our talks and you bugging me now that you'll be here." He closed his eyes, sighing.

Not wanting to cry I just went in for a hug. Pete has been like a father I never had since I was little, I'm talking diapers. Him and my mom were best friends and when she passed, he knew he had to look after me and I appreciate him for it.

Now I'm crying.

"Me too, I love you." I said quickly, wiping my tears and gathering my things to walk away. I couldn't look back at him because I could hear his sniffles too, I just kept walking.


anew - in a new or different and typically more positive way

Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.

anew - in a new or different and typically more positive way.


...


Thank you for reading, I appreciate you so much. <3 Now on to chapter two!

Let me start overWhere stories live. Discover now