Idris
"I'm done, Idris. I'm seriously done. I can't take them anymore. My mother believes him over us. How do you hear that two of your three daughters were raped and your husband knew but did nothing about it, and just decide not to do anything? Actually no, she did do something; she chose him. She chose him over all her children. But you know what, it's cool. It's really cool, because I don't fucking need them anyway. I'm a grown ass woman. I have a son and another child on the way. I don't need my mommy to check up on me.
They can both burn in hell for all I care. I'm good. I'm great." I watched her fold the baby's clothes. "I'm better than great actually. I'm ducking amazing. Don't you agree?" She looked at me and I nodded. "Exactly. Fuck. Them!" She walked out the room with some of the clothes to put them away. I took a deep breath and laid back.
"Man."
"I just find it funny, you know." I sat back up as she walked in. "How can you claim to love your kids but will let them endure so much abuse? Like she really watched my brothers be physically abused and did practically nothing. She watched him treat us like garbage and still chose him. He had a baby on her and still chose him. Dick ain't that fucking good to be abandoning your children. I love sex and I'm saying that." I swallowed a laugh. "Does she realize that her whole lifestyle is based on us? Who pays for her house? Her car? All the shit she can do is because of us. If she cuts us off, that money will run out eventually. Then who will she be crawling back to? She'll crawl back the minute Joseph finds some other basic ass woman. Then she'll come on some apology shit. But am I going to forgive her? Nope. Cry to somebody else." She took some more clothes out of the room.
"Jesus." I rubbed my temples and took some breaths again.
"This is some shit I would never do. I would never choose someone over Eissa. Or Winston. Or Isan. Or this baby. Never. Why? Because I'm an actual fucking mother. Even if someone wanted me to sacrifice for Shaniah, I would because that's love. That's a fucking mother! And that's not who she is. She's just so....ughhh. I just.....ughhh." She took a deep breath. "She's going to need me, you know. She's going to need me and I'm not going to be there. I'm going to move on." She sniffled and that's when my part came in. I pulled her into me. "I don't need her." Tears fell from her eyes as I held her. She put her head in my chest and cried. Her hand gripped my thigh as she cried harder.
"I know, baby." I rubbed her back. "I know."
"I want my mommy back, Idris."
"I know."
"Why would she hurt me like this?"
"We may never understand the actions or choices of others." I lifted her head and wiped the tears off her cheeks. "But what we can do is choose how we react and that's what you have to do right now. You can be sad about their actions now, but you can't stay here. You can't stay in this spot. There's too many things you're meant to do." She nodded.
"I know. I just.....I've never been in a place where I couldn't go to my mother."
"I understand and it's going to take you some time to get used to this, but don't worry, you have more support than you know. Okay?"
"Okay." I pecked her lips and hugged her again.
"Baby?" She was muffled.
"Hmm."
"Do you want to get married?"
"I thought we were already engaged."
"We are. I'm asking if you want to get married now?" She pulled away and looked at me.
"Are you serious?"
"Yeah. I have my dress, you have your tux. We can get my siblings and the kids. Isan and Winston's mom and my friends can come. It can be small in a chapel."
