Caution: Self harm, suicidal thoughts, verbal abuse is mentioned. If you are uncomfortable with stories like this please don't read further.
Y/n pov
"Oh Y/n you are back "
I came back home from the company and straight went to my room ignoring my roommates as the eyes me in worry. As I entered my room I closed the door and rested my back on it.
My mind went back to the incidents that took place today as I felt a sharp pain in my chest and unknowingly tears slipping down my eyes . My legs lost its strength and I slide to the floor.
Not being able to hold anymore I started crying.
Today was the evaluation day .
And I was on the last 3 again.
I almost got kicked out of the company but managed to stay as the one below me got evaluated.
I am a trainee at the entertainment company hybe labels.
I wanted to be a k-pop idol ever since I started watching BTS and got fascinated by the idol life.
And as I had an interest in dancing and singing I auditioned and got selected at the first try.
But being a foreigner in korea wasn't easy.
I got discriminated against the other Korean trainees and always came second last or third last in the trainee list.
And it was also because I wasn't able to give my best being on a diet and dancing 24/7 . I never was on a diet my entire life and it's very hard for me now that it's making me lose my energy.
As I was crying my phone rang and I saw that mom was calling me.
I closed my eyes as I really didn't have time to deal with her.
I cleared my throat and picked up the call.
"Hello" I tried to sound as normal as I can .
"Were you at the evaluation list again?"
I almost laughed out as she didn't even ask how was I doing?
" Yes"
"Omg y/n ! I told u this is not gonna work out but you didn't listen to me and now see"
"Why don't you just give up already? It's the 3rd time this happened. Just come back home "
I closed my eyes as her words just worked as a oil on fire and more tears spilled from my eyes.
"Mom please "
"What? You would have passed 12 th with good grades and would happily be in some college right now if weren't because of your stupid dream.
I knew you couldn't do this. You are useless y/n just come back already stop wasting your father's mone-"
Before she can continue I cutted the call and I started crying even more.
I can't take this anymore.
Everyday I try so hard but it doesn't seem to work. All I do is disappoint everyone.
" You are useless"
"You can't do this"
"Why do you keep gaining weight?"
" Do you even know how to dance?"
"Have u looked at yourself?"
All their words kept ringing in my ears as closed my and started screaming.
"STOP IT! PLEASE! I AM TRYING"
I couldn't take it anymore I went to the drawer opened it and found a cutter in there.
