The Fall of the Fainthearts

Track Six: We Made It, We Almost Didn't

Kian Cash: The song was a hit. What can I say? It blew me away. Part of me didn't want it to with the way he was in front of me with this smug looking grin on his face, but this song would be just as much a success for me as it would be for them.

You know talent when you meet it. Most times I've found that it belongs to the people who deserve it the least. I'm still trying to make my mind up whether Faintheart deserved it or not.

Dahlia: Axel was so confident. I don't know how when he was asking so much of us. He bolted in and woke us up at seven in the morning and told us we had five hours to come up with something good to back this new song he'd written. I could've clocked him in the face.

Vince: We had to just cycle through really old material until we found a melody that made sense. I've never felt stress like it in my life, but I still look back on that morning fondly. It was the morning we wrote our first number one.

Bentley: We all knew it was about Figgy, that was a given. I think the whole of Mayfair knew it was about her. But if you'd ask him about it, he'd deny it and move on like he was sick at just the mention of her name.

I know they didn't exactly end things amicably but his reaction was just strange. He was so defensive about it.

Vince: I remember saying to him, actually, "Does it really matter that she inspired the song when the end result is that good?" Sometimes you have to get your heart broken a few times to write a good tune, I've always said it.

Axel: I hated people thinking that my only good song was about her. I'd been writing for years and never written anything that everybody was collectively happy with.

Telling me my only good song was about Figgy was like telling me that I could only write anything decent when it was about being completely off my nut. I didn't want her to be the only reason I was any good.

Kian Cash: They all sat huddled around the little sofa in the studio waiting for me to say what I thought. Everyone, but Axel, looked nervous. He knew we had a hit. He was open, arms behind the back of the seat, just beaming at me. The rest of them were hunched over and prepared for rejection.

I could knock Axel down a peg or two and shatter their dreams into a million pieces in the click of a finger. Or, I could be honest with myself and tell them they had something great. Weighing it up, giving them that deal was worth inflating Axel's ego a bit more. I'd deal with that later.

Axel: He didn't say anything, he just started shaking our hands, one by one. He skipped over me and left me till last, but when he shook my hand he grabbed hold of it and pointed at me, right in the face. I'll never forget what he said to me.

"You've got something special kid. Don't waste it being an asshole."

Bentley: The night Kian signed us to his label was awesome.

Vince: Honestly? I don't remember much of it. But that tells me all I need to know about it.

Dahlia: We drove around for a bit, screaming out of the window to whoever would listen to us that we'd 'made it'. It was all so surreal, I think we all kinda expected we'd wake up from the dream tomorrow morning and life would go back to normal, so we basked in it while we could.

Axel: We ended up at some random sorority party at this arts school, just full of music majors and fashion girls. Pretty much everyone there was a regular at The Underground and this one guy swooned over Dahlia so much that we were snuck in.

Dahlia: Eric? No, no. We were just friends. Nothing more.

Bentley: We partied like we were never gonna see another day. It's a miracle that Axel did.

Axel: I think I got a bit too carried away with the idea of being this new 'rockstar'... I wasn't the failing band kid anymore, I was a somebody. I celebrated the only way I knew how.

Vince: We were hours deep into the party at this point when I found him outside, just laying in the grass, laughing at nothing. At first I thought it was funny, that he was just having a good time like us. I sat down with him and just started chatting, who even knows about what? All I remember is when he stopped talking back to me. I can't even talk about it.

Axel: I was just taking everything that was offered to me, I wasn't even asking what it did. I just thought I could handle it, like I was invincible or something because of how I spent my college years.

Dahlia: Vince came running into the house with a look on his face that made me instantly sick to my stomach. I knew something was really wrong before he even spoke. And then when he did speak, all he could say was, "he's not breathing" over and over. I sobered in an instant.

Bentley: I don't know why he left him. He could've died, then and there. But we were all pretty messed up and the guy panicked, I guess. It's not healthy to hold a grudge, especially when you're in a band with them.

Dahlia: I've never run so fast in my life. Apparently the music stopped and everyone was screaming but the thumping in my ears drowned out everything else. All I could think was that our frontman was dying, right in front of us. Not just our frontman, our friend. He'd given us the happiest day of our lives, and now he was going to die on it.

Vince: Axel has got Dahlia to thank for saving his life that night. Because while I ran away and I panicked and cried, she sprung into action. It really does a number on my self-esteem when I think back to it all. But I'm glad she was more of a man than I was. Poor choice of words, I know.

Dahlia: I'd done it before, for one of the ladies in my old band. It's not something that I ever wanted to go through again but... there I was. And I couldn't lose him. So it was one of those moments where I either crumbled in self-pity or I did everything I fucking could to save his life. There was only one real option.

Bentley: I fetched her some of the strongest spirit I could find and she drenched her sleeve in it and shoved it under his nose, no hesitation. She smacked his cheek, shook his shoulders, but nothing was getting him to come around.

Dahlia: His pulse was so faint, but it was there. So I started doing CPR.

Vince: You don't realise how much you needed to pay attention in life until shit hits the fan. If Dahlia wasn't there, Axel would've been long dead. There she was, impressing us again. I didn't believe there was anything she couldn't do, after that. I still don't.

Dahlia: When he opened his eyes... I just cried. I sobbed and shouted and yelled at anyone to call an ambulance. I just broke. It's... really hard to talk about, actually. If we could move on?

Axel: All I can remember is looking up and seeing her face. She looked petrified. She choked on her tears and screamed for an ambulance and then everything faded out again.

Bentley: Man... how quickly the best day of your life can turn into the worst.

Axel: I didn't wake up until the next morning. Or, I don't remember if I did. Then it all became real.