Love and Food

xlv: the end of the first year

Here we are. At the end of the first year.

Well, to say it like this, I failed my accounting certification exam, twice. 

But, for most of the year I had a little distraction to say.

It's fine. As long as I passed the class, which I did with an 81 for the year.

Not bad for somebody that math is their weak link.

I head to my car and plug my airpods in. The warm air of May is finally starting to soak in. I feel rejuvinated, I feel free. 

The first year of college is done. I wonder what is going to happen next.

-

Now, you might be confused as to why the story had suddenly changed from third person all the way to first all of a sudden.

Let me tell you why.

You were seeing the story through the eyes of a bystander, as if you were watching a movie.

Truth is, the whole time, I was Cecilia.

Yes, the writer of this book was in fact Cecilia the whole time.

And you might wonder, no way that this is not a true story.

It actually is, most of the events that have happened in this story are no work of fiction. Just, a few names were changed, some events were even altered and collided together, and while a few parts were added and removed, the basis of the story is a reality.

There were 3 guys and each guy I no longer talk to or see anymore.

I would say that it's for the best.

When I look back and read the story, I laugh and really wonder "Man, I did that. I'm not going to do that again."

But, you can't deny that it makes a good story to tell at a reunion.

However, I do not want to be known for running a love square or love pyramid or whatever you would consider what happened in this book.

The story as it was happening in real life seemed as if it was a novel that somebody would read. Which is why I wrote "Love and Food", and also the stories that are based off of a true story are always juicy.

This story has been in production for 10 months and after having many times where I wanted to guve up, this would be my first time completing a novel since 2021, even if some of the chapters are short and some seemed half assed at times, I wanted to get the story complete so I can move on to the next story. 

Life is full of many stories, some that seem out of this world and some where you never expect what will happen next.

At the end of the day, you lose, you learn, and you realize.

What I learned from this experience was to always follow your gut, and if something seemed wrong, it probably was. Once you realize what was happening and when you take off the rose colored glasses, you see the truth, the bad, and the ugly.

Cecilia is me, but a more inexperienced, timid, and slightly immature version of me. Even though the time I am writing this story is 1 year to 5 months ago, I have learned to love myself and focused immensly on self growth. Since then, I have found myself and I feel as if I don't have to change who I am to fit somebody's standards of who they want me to be.

I am me, and I don't ever go down without a fight.

My first year of college was a shift from a toxic high school to a brand new college and a program full of people just like me, and many more kinds of diverse personalites all around. As somebody that was so used to being seen as "weird" for a long time, I felt like a stranger could see that on my face. However, when I got to college, I was suddenly approached by a lot of new people, and a few guys (Evan and Kyle were prime examples)

I stuggled with trauma for a long time, and I do believe that a new enviornment was all I needed. I had experiences that helped resolve my patterns that were embedded by trauma and most of the issues are now gone.

Despite that, this was a year of finding myself, understanding right from wrong, and challenging the once scared version of me.

The next story or adventure is somewhere, but I'm not in a rush to find it, I'll let it come to me.

With that, thank you for reading and enjoying Love and Food!