Play Pretend

Chapter 50

#OLAPlayPretend

Chapter 50
Option

I had no idea where I got the courage to still come to work despite being late, but I still did. Nag-half day na lang ako dahil parang ganoon din naman.

Ang daming naglalaro sa isipan ko. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang uunahin intindihin.

I didn't give Xaiver's mother an answer. She said I didn't have to decide at the moment. Puwedeng pag-isipan ko muna for a day or a week, but she was very willing to spend so much just so I would leave her son.

Hindi ako makapaniwalang naranasan ko na naman 'to. The first time I did, it was with Zoe Bautista, when her company and family were still influential. I remembered how I refused her right off the bat when she offered ten million. Pero ngayon, hindi ako nakasagot. I was silent.

Her offer was tempting. Gusto kong ipatingin si Mama sa specialist, lalo na't mukhang hindi maganda ang pakiramdam niya simula pa noong nakaraang buwan. I don't think another checkup would suffice. At kung gusto ko ng mas advance na tests, it would cost a lot, lalo na't nasa mga private health care institutions ang mga machine.

However, I couldn't find the courage in me to accept her offer. Hindi kaya ng konsensya ko. Ngunit kahit hindi niya hilingin sa akin, after learning everything about the past, I knew leaving Xaiver was the right thing to do.

I am not what he needs. I will only ruin everything.

And I don't want to cause him pain. I don't want to be the one who destroys him. I don't want to be the reason for his downfall.

Bukod doon, naiintindihan ko rin kung saan nanggagaling ang kanyang ina. All she ever wanted was to protect her son. Naranasan niya nang mawalan ng anak at alam kong ayaw niya nang pagdaanan ulit 'yon.

On the other hand, I guess all the men who came into my life were only meant to pass by. Mula kina Daddy at Papa, si Charles at ngayon, si Xaiver... dumaan lang sila.

Maybe I don't really need a man to get through life. I don't need them to stay. They are not for me. I can do this alone... with my mom. I'll be fine on my own.

Huminga ako nang malalim at saka nag-angat ng tingin sa lobby. Nakaupo ako sa loob ng coffee shop habang hinihintay na matapos ang lunch break. As if it was right on cue, I saw Mr. Dela Vega and Xaiver walking down the lobby. Parehong seryoso ang mga mukha. Kung maghahanap ka ng pagkakaiba nilang dalawa, talagang mahihirapan ka. They were like two peas in a pod. Hindi maipagkakailang mag-ama sila.

Nanatili ang mga mata ko kay Xaiver. Sinundan ko siya hanggang sa makalabas. I didn't take my eyes off him, as if that was the last time I would see him. He was making the same face he always wore whenever he would go to a business battlefield. He looked so untouchable and authoritative. Para bang hindi mo siya kayang lapitan at kausapin. All you can do is stare at him from a distance.

I was lucky that I had the privilege to stay by his side for years as his secretary and enter his world as his wife. Sayang nga lang at hindi iyon nagtagal. It was a short-lived, priceless dream. A dream that I once took for granted. A dream that I almost turned a blind eye on.

Ngayon, pagkatapos magising sa panaginip, isa na lang ako sa mga taong nakatingin sa kanya sa malayo. Hindi na ako makakalapit. Hindi na ako magiging parte ng buhay niya.

I bitterly smiled and took a deep breath. Pinanood kong sumakay sa isang sasakyan ang mag-ama. Kasunod nila si Joseph na pumasok na rin sa front passenger seat. Without wasting a second, the SUV drove past the driveway and onto the main road.

Napaayos ako ng upo nang maalala ang sinabi kanina ni Mrs. Dela Vega. She said something about Xaiver messing up. Na tinutulungan siya ngayon ng ama dahil sa pagkakamaling nagawa.