After the Eventide

the family's sweetheart

I. the first part

if I'm found dead at the scene, my body is lying on the ground
blood on your hands, also splattered in every corner of the room
after coming clean, they would still let you go, safe and sound
you won't be put behind bars, despite the wealth you've consumed

my family is a force to be reckoned with for their sweetheart
the jury would justify your doings after tearing my skin apart
it's useless to turn yourself in as it'll only cost one day in prison
the world has always been on your side, following your decisions

weapons with your fingerprints, surrounding us in secrecy
a guilty defendant charged would appear innocent easily
as such lawlessness occurs, there will be no rules to follow
the hearing of this case will result in a victory that's hollow

II. the second part

lost my support system as I lost a little weight from barely eating
thinking of returning to you, a history that only keeps on repeating
strands of my hair fall as you bear to not care about my anguish
unintentionally staying up, I'm losing sleep as the hours diminish

I can only oppose every thought that my family has mentioned
ingraining half-truths and half-lies is what you often intentioned
even if what only mattered to you was being vindicated every time,
a grieving soul is dying as it hopes to see you in another lifetime

grasped into an ardor—tightened my grip till I had to lose you too
ignored the warnings of my friends as you ripped a heart into two
we're out of each other's personal spaces, a sign we're both free
as the days go by, I can't help myself from wanting you back to me

III. the third part

don't reach out if that's how you've left your messages to be written
getting fooled for the third time is a move that should be forbidden
as I faced such ill-effects from my family and the family's sweetheart,
I've let myself get wounded in a battle I can never win from the start

reminiscing on a short-lived romance—a heart fights till midnight
creaking footsteps are heard as I walk down an eerie street at night
my mind starts to create phantoms as I visualize an image of you
looking at my side, I grasp that these figments can never be true

from a distance, a specific breed of dog howls while the moon is out
went to a neighborhood where there was no house only to let a shout
you left me in the lurch to endure rumors as you eluded your crimes
if I earned a coin for every blame you deflected, I'd own many dimes

IV. the last part

as you've understated every suffering I've gone through,
a heart questions its doubts, "what did I put myself into?"
as the ill-effects subside, the living resentment is bound to die
a new rule is created in your game—a player must abide by

word on the street is I want it my way with the decisions you make
yet, between the significant occurrences of your life, where am I?
thoughts like this I can only shrug off and cast upon the crimson sky
in your life, you often made me feel like I had no reason to partake

if I avenge, would I get closure or meet the grim reaper a day closer
oscillating amidst needing you or wanting someone new is never over
despite the replaying hindsight and feeling like I want to lose myself too
with the belief of not wanting to do anything with you, I still want you