If Only- A Tere Bin Story

The Conversation

Meerab swallowed her pride and decided she didn't really mind company at this hour so, she signaled Murtasim to come sit on the sofa as she settled in the far right of the only furniture in the room, leaving the left side for him. Murtasim nodded and with a soft smile went ahead to sit on the sofa beside her.

Murtasim gave Meerab the coffee he bought and she took it without protest. They sat there in silence with the sounds coming from the bio-medical machines at the background. The atmosphere of the room was awkward and the silence was uncomfortable. Meerab decided to do something about it and said,

"Thanks.." Murtasim looked at her confused..."For the coffee" Meerab cleared, gesturing toward the coffee cup she was now holding.

"Yeah....Don't mention"

Silence again.

"Haya was banished form the Haveli..." Murtasim informed Meerab all of sudden realizing he didn't mentioned this in their last conversation.

"I know, Anwer Baba told my Baba." Meerab replied

"It turns out  she knew about Malick Zubair all along" Murtasim said as he turned to look at Meerab and found no surprise on her face.

"You knew?"

"She told me"

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"you didn't let me...remember?"

"Oh"

Silence......

"Rohail was in hospital for 2 days last week....it seem you send him your regards." Meerab was saying dramatically as Murtasim reddened not with rage but with embarrassment. He realized it was an extremely immature thing to do so, he had sent Bakhtu the next day to cover Rohail's medical expenses and also to make sure he was well.

"Wo....Actually..." Murtasim was finding it hard to explain this situation to Meerab

Meerab on the other hand was finding his hesitation amusing. The great Murtasim Khan was at loss of words. Meerab barely controlled a laugh.

"well! That was stupid" Murtasim said, giving up.

"Yeah that was" Meerab agreed and they both laughed, relaxing a little.

Murtasim saw Meerab tug both her feet under her as she changed her position to a more comfortable one. For the first time since he had arrived in Karachi Murtasim noticed what Meerab was wearing. It was a faded old oversized purple T-shirt over a trouser which was in fact a pajama with little pink hearts on it. She threw a big black chaddar over it, which Murtasim figured was done in urgency as she left the house in a hurry.

Her cloths were completely mismatched but she looked comfortable, casual and utterly cute. Murtasim also realized that Meerab was always dressed, prim and proper in the Haveli, Maa begum wouldn't have it any other way. Another liberty taken away from her, Murtasim thought ruefully.

"Well....we reacted in weird ways when it cames to Haya and Rohail." Meerab was saying matter-of-factly

"Yeah" Murtasim agreed

"We never were good with communication were we?" Meerab ask sheepishly

"Unfortunately...I have to agree." Murtasim said Frankly.

"We never once sat and talked" Meerab said suddenly amused "Well, you just wanted to give orders and not listen" she accused Murtasim not angrily.

"Well apparently, you are not very good at listening either...orders or otherwise." he quipped. Meerab shrugged and Murtasim laughed. His laugh stirred something in her but she hid it.

"No wonder our marriage couldn't survive" Meerab said and then looked at Murtasim to gauge his reaction. He was Looking on the floor but nodding in agreement.     

"We had no trust, no communication....we were doomed" Meerab concluded looking at Murtasim as his eyes flickered to her face and a weird curiosity appeared on his face as he tilted his head to one side and cautiously spoke,

 "Well we didn't have all that but......We had something Meerab, didn't we?"  He asked genuinely intrigued.

Meerab contemplated his question for a moment then replied,

"Chemistry"....."What we had was pure chemistry" Meerab said so casually that Murtasim was taken a back.                                                                               

"But, unfortunately...A relationship needs more to survive." Meerab explained

"Hmmmm...right! why you are insightful Meerab Khan" Murtasim said smiling now

"You figured?" Meerab replied with a raised eyebrow but smiled.

Murtasim right then had another realization, well it is a night of realizations. He came to realize that they had 10 month together and never once had a casual heart-to-heart. How many of such conversations they could have had, how differently they could have ended up. But, what a missed opportunity.

Meerab wasn't far behind in this realization. She liked him like this, simply sitting, talking, listening to her. But the tragedy was that they started off on the wrong foot and then they continued with that and now there was no going back.

The realization hit both of them at the same time and they both fell silent...again

Somewhere from afar they could hear the call for Fajr Prayer.

"I'll offer namaz now" She exclaimed getting up from the sofa.

Murtasim nodded and got up too. "I'll pray in the Mosque outside the Hospital" Murtasim said and then left the room quietly.

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Unbeknownst to both of them Waqas had woken up sometime when they were having their heart-to-heart and heard all of their conversation. Waqas, despite his reservations about the Khans, still believed that Murtasim's and Meerab's relation was salvageable and decided to do something about it as he closed his eyes again and pretended to sleep.

********************************************************************************************************Because they never talked, I had to make them!