07 | it's simple, but not easy

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i wore a white shirt, a black blazer, and black pants to the interview. my hair was curled and my makeup was kept to a minimum. leo wore a grey shirt, a black jacket, and black pants. there was some gel and hairspray in his hair but for the most part that was it. but he smelled so clean, the scent of cologne attacking my nose as he walked by or sat near me.

both of us were pretty nervous for the interview. the night before, leo got his laptop out after i put mia in her cot and started researching our names to find recent articles. i joined him on the couch and he shared his screen so both of us could read what the articles were saying about us. it was the first time we saw the news. we were so caught up with ourselves that we completely forgot that we were famous and people were watching our lives like a hawk.

after a little bit of research, this was our conclusion: the whole world thinks we're secretly dating, leo broke up with his girlfriend of three years, and i divorced sam because i am in love with leo.

fortunately, pictures of us kissing in public were not taken, however, there are some pictures of us after that incident. yesterday, we, including mia went out to spend some time together. we ended up going out for lunch, we walked around the city, got some ice cream, and took a look at some shops. oblivious to us, there were just a few paparazzi that managed to sneak photos of us holding hands or photos of me leaning into his arm. sometimes i forget i can't act the way i like in public or else things like this happen.

there were hundreds of pictures of us at the red carpet premiere of 'revolutionary road.' i cringed at myself. seeing my face as we pretended to kiss was hard to miss. but when i looked at leo's face, i could understand why everyone thought that there was something more between us. it was not just me. it was him too.

so to get out of the spotlight, leo suggested to drive us over to the interview site, instead of going via limo like we were going to do. his parents offered to babysit mia once again, because the interview was going to be filmed so she wouldn't be able to sit on my lap or make much noise. now, like before, it was just the two of us, and the hour drive that used to be ahead of us flew behind us rather quickly.

while leo was parking the car in the small car park, i moved my legs up and down, and rolled my thumbs around each other in circles.

"did bar ever get back to you?" i asked. after looking at the paparazzi photos and reading the articles, i realized that what was happening was completely unfair to leo's girlfriend. of course i took note of that before, but given the whole situation i didn't even think about it. he explained to me that he tried phoning multiple times but she didn't answer. she did, however, page him and say she was staying at a friend's house, and because bar had many many friends, it was quite literally impossible for him to get in touch with her anyway.

"no, she didn't. sweetheart, it's okay, i don't think the interviewer is going to ask us personal questions. they'll only ask about the movie." he attempted to soothe me down, but i didn't believe it. the biggest news stations and newspapers said everything everyone wanted to hear.

i took deep breaths in and out to calm me down, but to no avail. he got a hold of my hand and squeezed it tightly, to which i squeezed back.

at that moment i realized i had ruined everything for him, and yet here i was panic stricken and a nervous wreck, while he stayed calm to comfort me.

we got out of the car and headed straight to the building where our interview was going to take place. leo and i requested it to be short and simple. we ordered our stylists to stay put so we could run the whole thing ourselves.

as we entered, a gush of wind brushed past me and gave me a bit of a fright. leo chuckled and i ended up doing so as well. the main room was similar to the main room for actual job interviews. it was strange, considering how my interviews are usually in photo shoot buildings, studios, and occasionally on the tele with talk show hosts.

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