Just you and I

XVIII

(POV Saylor)

I'm almost done with my shift. Finally. There's a lot of drunk people here already, and I'm grossed out. I've had 4 grown old men hitting on me in the span of 30 minutes, so I wanna leave.

Plus, I feel bad for making Dani color with Soof.
I don't know what got into me when I wrote the assignment for English. But I've been downward spiraling for weeks now.

My grades suck, I've been kicked out most classes. The only class I'm excelling in, is art.
It's the perfect way to out all my emotions without people wanting to send me to a psych ward.

I haven't stopped thinking about Dani, and even if I tried to, Sofia reminded me every day of the fact that she exists. I hated lying to her, but I just couldn't face Dani.

When she showed up today, I didn't feel angry anymore. I don't think I ever was angry, I felt betrayed. And vulnerable. And I felt stupid for opening up to her. I have major trust issues,
I will always think people have bad intentions.
She made it easy to open to, she made it easy to talk, she made everything easy. But she doesn't owe me anything for that. And I can't hold it against her for doing what she wants to do.

My feelings were valid, but how I reacted wasn't fair. And unfortunately Sofia made me realize that. She doesn't know though, thank God because she'd forever brag about it.

She was talking about her class yesterday after school, she told me that Chloe was playing with someone else during break and that she didn't have anyone to play with, but that she didn't get mad, because Chloe can play with other people too. And it didn't mean anything to me at first, but later that night I started thinking about it. And Sofia was right, it's not because Chloe and her are friends, that Chloe can't be friends with anyone else.

I walk over to Lucy to tell her my shift ended and that I'm headed home. "Tell Sofia she can take candy home. Oh, and the girl that's with her, she's a keeper." I roll my eyes and give her a hug, yes a hug. She's like family to me. And she's earned it.

I walk to the back to let them know I'm done.
I walk in to Dani whispering "sst", she's holding a sleeping Sofia on her lap. They look adorable. "My shift's over." She quietly gets up while still holding Sofia. I smile at her and grab their coats and Sofia's candy before leaving.

We head out to the parking lot, she carries Sofia to my car and puts her in her car seat.
I buckle her in and quietly close the door.
I lean against the door, while Dani's standing a little further away.

"Thanks for carrying her. And watching her. And coloring. And coming."
She chuckles. I wanna say everything I have to say. I just can't form my thoughts into sentences, or even words. I don't know where to start and I don't want this to be awkward.

"Dani, I- I don't know where to start and-"
"Saylor. Come home with me."
I frown. "What?"
"Come home with me. We'll talk there. We can put Sofia in bed and talk."
"I don't know, Dani."
"I want you there. I want both you and Sofia there. And so does Oakley. He misses her."

I look back at Sofia in the car, and then at Dani, "okay."

I drive to my house first to drop off the car. Dani insisted on driving us. I park the car and wait for Dani to get there. Once she's here, I carefully pick Sofia up from her seat while Dani grabs her seat and moves it to her car. I put Sofia back down and buckle her in. Good thing she's a deep sleeper. She probably won't even remember any of this in the morning.