L.M.I. My Second Tenderness

Chapter 9: Revelation

Chapter 9: 'Revelation'

"That's all I wanted to tell. From good to bad memories I won't ever forget. It's hard to move on, but all this stuffs, remain in the past, never to return in the present." I said while reminiscing the past.

It's suppose to be a good day but why am I sad? Just because of that stupid past, it shall not affect on my date today.

Lian replied while her eyes show me that I can rely on her, and I can tell all my problems to her, "Don't you cry. I'm already here to caress you with your problems."

"Thank you so much I met you Lian." I said, replying to her with joyful expressions. I eventually forgot the pain from my past because of Lian. She restored my strength.

It's seldom for me to see or meet a person who will treasure someone, as if that person is very important for her life. Lian truly expresses she likes me, not in the way I think, but as a fellow friend she met in a coincidence.

"You don't need to thank me. There are many out there who are like me. And it just happened you met me." She said.

"You're unique." The simple reply I uttered which made her smile, focusing her eyes to me.

The dream I had a few days ago seemed to be a reminder to me: "Remeber, do not hurt the girl that you love so much." I'm processing all the situations for my move not to be incorrect.

I planned on a special date with Lian which I plan to happen in Valentine's day. I'm thinking of touring her in a museum then walk in a park and have a date to a magnificent restaurant in town! I'll also be confessing on that same day.

I've been thinking of this plan for almost one week since I find difficulties to set this up. Sometimes, I ask some help to Zac about this. As the week already passed by, he eventually called me.

"Hey man! How are you?"

I replied, "Yeah man, I'm okay, feeling well."

"How are you with Lian?"

I answered "We're fine dude." I wondered why he asked about both of us.

"Well good! Having a strong relationship." He replied with an exciting reaction.

"Well I'm not yet confessing my feelings but I think I'm ready". I answered while I chuckle a bit.

"Goodluck bro!" He said.

"Thanks! I know it's gonna be hard, but what other choice would I do, unless... I hold away this feelings I have, which I can't even do." I replied.

"It all depends on you. If you can go for it. Go for it! Oh by the way, better leave. My parents are already finding me."

"Keep safe my old friend." I said and we dropped the call afterwards.

I conclude, that this might be the right moment for me to admit my feelings that I truly love Lian. This is the time I've been waiting for, to tour her in a park and have a date. But what if she won't respond to my invite? What if she wouldn't want to join me in the plan I've been initiating for almost a week.

I don't hold her accountable if she can't love me back. But how else I can live if I see her loving someone else rather than me? Sometimes, it's too risky falling in love to someone, for you don't have any idea if the girl you're pursuing, also feels the same way as yours. But in an imagination you contrive, it feels real, only in your mind, and speaking not of what is the reality. My mind suddenly bleeds when the possibility of Lian rejecting me, and the happy imagination I create, would collide, mixing up emotions I can't understand, and I can't detail.

My friend, Kharl had told me, before the time he died. "Bro! Do not overthink about what will happen. Love is like a game, and you have to play it by the rules. But if you are willing to play it, then go! But do not let yourself be grimly. There are times we don't win and that's okay." Perhaps what he said is true. Times come I will fall over, but despite this, I should not be bothered, nor become weak, nor fall in the chamber of sadness. But what I must do is strive harder. If I love Lian, I shall catch her, even in the depths of Hades.

A few minutes later, I called to Lian to request if I can date her on that particular day. I know I'm shy to utter it but I have to do so. Zac just told me, "If you can go for it, go for it!"

"Hello? John?" The first phrase she asked.

That moment I was thinking again what to say. I got shy hearing her voice.

"Uhhhh....Hey Lian. I'd ask if I can date you in a nearby town. Can you come with me on Sunday of 7 PM?" I asked, with the shyness that won't leave me.

I got frightened of what she would answer. My hands were shaking, and my heart beats fast. I sweat hardly.

"Hmmmmmm....I'm not sure but I'll try" She answered which made me back to normal.

"I hope that day will be your free time." I said.

"Thanks. See you then Lian!" My last greetings before putting down the line.

Sometimes, when I call or chat her, I'd want to say "I love you", but I don't have that strength yet so I shall not be stupid. I'd beter think straight and.... uhhh just sleep, that might lead again on my overthinking.

I ran towards my room and headed to the bed. I jumped on it and felt so relaxed. I just scroll on my phone and I didn't notice the time like, hey? I'm enjoying and the time disturbed me. I looked at the clock and it's 9 PM. Oh come on! It reminded me to now sleep but I don't want to, duhhh. I'm still enjoying scrolling on my phone.

As I furtherly scroll, I saw a post of Lian, a picture of her and a caption "Love me please". Actually, okay it's running in my mind again, comment and say what if the person who commented in this post is your future. Oh it's a big no no! My moves might be noticed.