If I loose her, I loose myself.

Chapter 10

Liliana's p.o.v.
       Common courtesy could have just told me, you can't keep a guest standing. But man, I was just not expecting him to come to my house few hours after dropping me off. Plus, when he smiled at me even though it was ridiculous, it felt nice. He shared a smile with me, not once but twice. And he even apologized. No wonder I forgot to invite him in.

       "Please come in." I said as I opened the door wide for him to enter. He was broad like those Greek gods from movies. I followed behind closely. Maddie was sitting on the couch, legs crossed as she held her phone texting whoever she was texting. Vi was upstairs, probably asleep. She loves to sleep. I offered Ivan a seat and water then I excused myself to change in dry clothes.

         Coming back downstairs, Maddie was stealing glances at Ivan who sat on the couch next to my favorite teddy bear. He kept looking at Maddie and when they eventually had eye contact, he whispered something to her I couldn't catch. Maddie gave a small smile and walked to the door. When she spotted me, she said; "I'm going out for a while." I only nodded looking a bit confused. But anyway, I brushed it off.

        "Your friend is going to meet my Romeo." He said. "They like each other." He added. When did she get to meet Romeo again? I know they met only once but when did they start liking each other? Even I don't like Ivan. Um, I mean I don't like him that much. I like Ivan but mine is very understandable. We've hanged out unlike Romeo and Maddie which I'm not sure has ever even be left together to talk.

        But anyway, I'll ask her later. She has serious explanations to do. As for now, let me focus on the man in front of me. I sat on the couch across Ivan even though he pointed beside him where he wanted me to sit. "I'm okay here." I whispered. He looked disappointed for some few seconds but man, I'm keeping my distance. 

        "I want you and I to go somewhere. An event. We'll be visiting the orphanage home to donate some stuffs to them." Oh yeah. I know he donates to them always and that's just so kind and sweet of him. You know there is actually more joy in giving and the joy that will be on the faces of those young ones will be priceless. I just know it.

         I smiled at him and nodded. "I'd love to do that with you." I said. "Great. It's next month. I'll pick you up myself, we'll get there in the morning and we'll leave after giving it to them." I nodded again. "That's not a problem."

       After that, Ivan just sat there, looking into my face. I gave him an awkward smile which he didn't really return. Man, is he only going to keep staring at me? I can't tell him to leave too. It'll just be as if I'm telling him to leave my house. "Can I get you something to drink? Perhaps water or some tea?" He shook his head a little. Great. He didn't want anything.

        "Then is there a problem?" I asked trying to break the silence. "Why didn't you sit beside me? I thought you are my girlfriend now?" He said. Girlfriend? Since when did I turn into his girlfriend? When I agreed to get to know him better and he took it as me accepting his proposal.

        "Well, about that. I didn't really agree to be your girlfriend yet. I said I'd love to know you more.  And honestly, I'd love us to start off as good friends. We can get to know each other better. I get to know you, you get to know me. It's a win win for both of us. Plus, I'd love to start working before entering into a relationship." I said, playing with my fingers in a nervous way. How is he going to react?

        "Okay." He simply said. Okay? I mean it's good he understood but just okay? I was a bit shocked. He understood too early. I was expecting him to say something or argue or even try to change my mind but he didn't. Instead, he just agreed with an okay. I looked at him skeptically. His expression didn't hold anything and I couldn't read either.

        "Okay." I also added just to get him to say something. And actually it worked.  He cleared his throat and said, "if that's what you want, then that's exactly what we are going to do. You really did give it a thought. Good job. I'm impressed as always." And then again, he smiled. It wasn't funny. It was a perfect smile.

       "So you do now how to smile." I said. He nodded and whispered, "I learnt from you. You always smile to me." Wow, could this get any better? He agreed and gave me a smile. A real smile to be precise. Ivan kept staring at me as if I was his favorite food or something. Why does he keep staring at me?

      "Ivan, you know a whole lot about me. But I know only few things about. There's this question that keeps bothering me. Why do you always stare at me?" Honestly, he didn't look surprised. He just crossed his leg and said; "because you are beautiful." I was taken aback just a little bit. I know I'm pretty but hearing it from his mouth a something else. It made me smile.

       "Because you fascinate me. Because you are so perfect. Because you are different from any other girl I've ever met. That's why I keep looking at you." OMG, that's so sweet. The words, his tone, his glare was all admirable. I could listen to that over and over again. I only found myself smiling to him. Then I muttered a thank you. At least he has a fine reason to keep looking at me.

        "About getting a job, would you mind working for me? I know you always love to be a secretary. You can be my secretary. I would love that but that's if you're okay with it." Of course I'd love to be his secretary. This is the real definition of getting a job without any stress. But honestly, I'd love to be his secretary. Not because it was a free job offer, it's because I want to be close to him. I mean, I can get to know him more as his secretary. The fact is not, I don't like him. I do and I'd love to keep him close. He's a genuine and honest person. Very hardworking and intelligent. And most of all, very kind.

      But I just know, Ivan will always stare at me in his work place. I don't want to be in a situation where by I'd definitely be hated by my colleagues and be the new employer who wants the boss to herself. I don't want others to think I got the job because I know him or he likes me. I want to be out there in search of a job as a secretary in another company.

       "Thank you very much for that amazing job opportunity. Don't get me wrong, I'd love to work as your secretary but my answer is a no."