My Story

migraines

As I've gotten older, with new and different and more pressing stressors in my life, I've been getting migraines.

Some for a few hours, some that last for days. Some with obvious causes, like sleep or caffeine, others like my irregular period warning me that I'll be bleeding soon, like in the next 24 to 48 hours. Sometimes, Advil or Tylenol give relief, and others leave me in pain, even in agony, until something shifts.

Sensitivity to lights, to sounds, to smells, excessive neck tension, constant increasing pressure by my temples, nausea, even to the point of vomiting, confusion, slower at work or at home...

But it's a battle I face alone. No one else in my family hurts like this, and none of them understand when all I want to do is sit in my room, or lay in my bed, or even hide in the bathroom with the lights off and the door closed so everything is pitch black and silent...

People wonder how and why I function at work when I'm hurting like this...but I don't feel like I really have a choice. If I were to call in absent, I can only really do that 4 times within a rolling 6 month time frame, and only if I retain perfect attendance for all the other shifts. And then how do you decide which 4 of your minimum 6 migraines in that time frame are truly worth calling in absent for? I've gotten to the point where I can do at least half of a customer's transaction with my eyes shut or squinting, but I'm still at work. Even been at a nine where I think I'm about to pass out, but I keep trucking along, and mentally try to plan how to pass out to one side or the other.

The only times I call out is when I throw up, not that I force the situation to occur, but when there is no other recourse and it happens, I stay home. Because if I can't hold food down, my attitude will be abysmal, and I don't need to be sick .and. written up or fired...

In 4hrs, this migraine will have been going in waves, off and on, for 2 days, and that's after less than 24hrs break since the last one...