ready for it? • t. zegras

thirty eight

"I know you take better candids than this, Trevor," I say. He decided that the best picture to show he's out on the lake was one of me looking at Jack with the most confusion I've ever seen on my face.

"It's cute," he argues.

"So are you when you literally have a bit of drool because you're knocked the fuck out but you don't see me posting that, do you?"

Cole nods. "Been there, done that."

"Yeah, at least no one else has ever posted something like this," Trevor says.

"I wasn't backing you up, dude."

"What the fuck?"

I send Trevor my victory smile before turning to Cole. "Thanks, sugar."

"I wasn't backing you up, Ten," Cole laughs.

"What the fuck?"

"Ew." He grimaces. "It's like you're the same person."

"He wishes," I say.

Trevor, at the same time, says, "She wishes."

We stop and stare at each other while the rest of the guys burst into laughter. Slowly, a grin grows on Trevor's face. I could see that happen when he's looking at me a million times and never get tired of it. I love making him smile. I love him.

"Stop looking at me like that," Z says.

I bite back a gasp. "Like what?!"

"Like if we weren't here you'd be jumping him for all he has," Jack states. I actually gasp.

"Don't talk about her that way, man," Trevor says.

Jack gasps this time. "She talks about me that way!"

"Nuh-uh!" I shout.

"You did it two hours ago telling him if he's going to stay up all night talking on the phone loudly, he might as well make it interesting and have some phone sex," Quinn says.

"I thought we were allies, angelface."

He laughs. "We are."

The conversation bleeds off to something else when Luke pops up from his phone and asks if anyone knew if someone they know got engaged. Trevor's still looking at me though. If anyone is looking at anyone like if the rest of the group wasn't here they'd be jumping the other for all they have, it's him. I try motioning for him to come over to me. He furrows his eyebrows and does the smallest of nods. I repeat my action and he gets up.

Now, he's smiling down at me. I motion for him to come even closer. Like I have something really important to say. He frowns slightly again. When I still simply wave my hand again, Trevor bends down so his head is right in front of me.

I lean forward, even shielding my lips from everyone else just in case any of them are good at lip-reading, and whisper in his ear, "If they weren't here, I'd jump you for everything you got."

A sharp exhale and a shaky breath of a laugh back out is all I get from him. Satisfied, I relax back into my seat. An attempt to focus on the conversation is made. It doesn't work. Z's still trying to process my words, I guess. His fingers mess with the strap of my swimsuit before he pulls it up and sends it snapping back against my shoulder.

In the next instant, he's back across the boat in his seat. It's my turn to be entranced by his actions. Such a small little thing has my mind swirling with only him. The way his hair looks with his summer tan. The way he throws his head back laughing at the joke Cole just cracked. His laugh. Him! I can't. I'm just so overwhelmed with the sunny feeling in my chest.

* * * * *

If I had been one for romance in my teens, that is what this would remind me of. My hand in Trevor's, pulling him giddily down the hall. Trying to make sure he keeps his voice down as I lead him down to the dock.

He looks back at the house once we're there. Almost asking for permission to not whisper. He does anyway. "What's got you so smiley?"

"Night swim," I say. He jokingly shushes me. "It's nothing on early morning but—"

I don't get to finish the sentence. Trevor's lips are on mine, slow and gentle. More pecks without leaving each other's lips than any kind of make-out or something. The result of being so mutually overwhelmed all day that small touches are the only thing that can keep you from bursting like a firework right then and there.

His arms snake around me and without stopping the kisses, picks me up. My legs wrap around his waist. I know what's coming the moment he starts walking. The water's refreshing against the sun feeling. It's cool and even cooler when we pop back up, hands still touching each other in some way as we tread water.

Trevor pushes his hair back with one hand. "What you pulled earlier was mean, you know?"

"You loved it," I shoot back, poking his chest a few times.

"Well, only 'cause I love—" He stops and looks at me closely. I wonder if he can see that my breath catches. That the sun is literally in my chest. "Only 'cause I love you."

It's not the first time one of us has said it, obviously. We were saying it long before we thought we'd get to this point. But there's a heavier weight to it now. Its meaning has changed. It's the first time either of us has said it with that weight. But it's natural. And of course, we're saying it early on because as I said, we already were saying it.

"God, I knew it!" I joke.

He laughs and I want to kiss him some more. "Nothing gets past you, genius."

"I love you too, babe." I didn't have to say it. I needed to.

Nothing could hide the way his face changes ever so slightly. His smile softer, his eyes warmer. It's a look I could drown in. If I could, I'd inject it into my veins without caring how dramatic that is.

"We already knew that, right?" He mumbles. I know what he's asking. He's asking if the known loving girl got what he meant. If I felt the weight.

My fingers find the charm around his neck. That silver T. "Don't you get it? Couldn't love anyone else the way I love you."

"I get it."

"Took you long enough."