'Lie Again' - Seventeen
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"I don't like you.
I have come to not like you.
I don't want to see you anymore."
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For those next two days leading up to Jeonghan and Seungcheol's date and even after, Joshua had shut himself in his room. He told himself he'd use the time to think and process everything, to reduce the fullness of his mind. He planned to tell the others that he's sick so that they'd leave him alone for at least a week- it would make sense, given Seungkwan and Jeonghan saw him sick the day before. So he texts Seungkwan, telling him that he's not feeling well and to not worry about him if he doesn't see him. Seungkwan, in response, scolded Joshua for not eating enough meals but ultimately believed him.
Unsurprisingly, word spread fast. Nearly all of the members visited his room; some visited in groups, some came back multiple times a day, and some left him food outside of his door, like Mingyu who cooked him a whole meal:
"Shua-hyung!" He heard a bang on the door. 'That can only be Mingyu.'
"I made some food for you! You need energy so you can feel better soon!" In front of him was a smiling Mingyu holding a tray with an array of food on it, and even some sliced fruit on the side.
"W-Woah, is this what you guys had for dinner today? There's no way you just cooked all of this for me." He took the tray and marvelled at the smell, mirroring Mingyu's smile.
"Well, we're about to have dinner. Everyone else is going to eat the rest of the food. I'm gonna go help set up the table downstairs- make sure you eat it while it's still hot! I set up a table outside of your room, just leave the tray there when you're done and someone will come grab it later." Joshua peered outside his room to see the table in question.
"Okay, thank you." He felt bad for lying to them like this, they were taking such good care of him- and he wasn't even sick, not the way that they think he is anyway.
Even Jihoon, who's usually cooped up in his room all day, went to visit:
"Ey... Shua-hyung, you need to look after yourself better. You're lucky we just finished promotions." Jihoon was wearing a mask in front of his door- it felt weird, but seemed in-character for him. He clicked his tongue in disapproval, and handed him a small cooler with two sports drinks in it.
"Yeah, everyone's been telling me. I know." He took the cooler from him and took a peek inside.
"Seungkwan said you threw up the other day, take these. Don't want you fainting or something. If you die in your room no one'll know."
"Thanks. How is everyone?" Joshua tucked the cooler behind him.
"Fine. We don't have any upcoming schedules, we'll let you know if anything comes up, don't worry. Just focus on resting and getting better. If anything, you can just miss an interview or something. No big deal." He reassured him, waving his hand a bit.
All of them checked up on him except for Jeonghan. It's not like Jeonghan wasn't talking to him at all, he was sending him texts asking how he was doing and about how he heard he got sick. He asked Joshua if he was mad at him, and asked if they could talk. Joshua didn't respond to any of his texts after "Are you okay, what happened?" and to this he simply replied: "I'm fine. Just sick".
His phone would ring occasionally, and it was always Jeonghan's name on the screen, but he never picked up. He spent most of that time in his room journalling out his feelings until his arm went numb and sometimes he'd make a bracelet or two when he got tired of writing.
YOU ARE READING
Smile Flower | Jihan
Fanfiction[based on the fictional Hanahaki disease] Joshua felt like he was going to die from the sheer stress of it all and he couldn't stop crying. He wasn't crying out of sadness, but out of anxiety, fear, and physical pain. He was scared out of his mind...
