'F*ck My Life' - Seventeen
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"Dumbest person alivе
From now on I'll fight for my life
For my own good, fight for my life"
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The next day, Joshua woke up early in the morning and quickly got ready to sneak out of the dorm. On his way to the doctor, he texted Seungkwan that he had left already. He didn't reply.
'It's still early, Seungkwannie is probably still sleeping. That's fine, he needs the rest.'
When Joshua arrived at the doctor's office, he didn't wait long.
"Hello Mr Hong, it's good to see you again. How have you been since we last met?" The doctor greeted him warmly.
"Um... not that good, if I'm being honest." Joshua laughed nervously.
"So what's going on? What's your condition like right now? Any blood?" She brought out a notepad, ready to jot down notes.
"Y-Yeah... I've been coughing up blood lately." Joshua nodded and she scribbled something on the notepad.
"And no issues with your medication?" She looked up.
"I just fainted yesterday, but I'm okay." He responded. The doctor nodded and scribbled some more notes.
"Okay, let me take a look." The doctor got up and did a quick check-up. He sat down on the bed and she checked Joshua's breathing with the stethoscope, making him take deep breaths, placing the drum on various parts of his torso.
The doctor sighed, "It's about as bad as I expected. The flowers must be restricting your breathing a lot, is it hard to breathe?"
"Yeah... it is." He looked down.
"I'm assuming you've made your decision, since you decided to come to my office." She sat back down at her desk.
"So, did you want to go through with the surgery?" She asked, looking him in the eyes.
He hesitated, his heart racing.
"Y-Yes. I want to go through with the surgery."
"I understand. I'll tell you how soon we can book you. We've been a bit busy lately but, since this is a bit of an emergency I'll try and have it scheduled as soon as possible, does that sound good?" She made a note on a piece of paper, looking up for confirmation. Joshua couldn't make eye contact with her, and just slowly nodded.
"Yeah. That sounds good. Thank you..." He stood up to leave before the doctor spoke again,
"I'm sure this was a very difficult decision for you, Mr Hong." Joshua turned around.
"Just know that you chose to do what you felt is best for yourself. Your life is just as important as your feelings for- whoever it might be. I'm sure there are many more people who love you out there, and you still have much to experience." He stopped to think about all the other members, especially Seungkwan- who had taken such good care of him. He was in good hands.
"Although you may lose this one part of your life- and I'm one hundred percent sure it feels like absolute shit right now- you will overcome it. The mind has its ways of bouncing back from adversity. I don't know if that's any comfort for you, and even if it's not, I think it's nice to keep in mind." She gave him a smile, which made Joshua cry. She stood up and walked over to him, offering a hug. He took it and quietly cried in her arms.
"T-Thank you." Was all he could squeak out.
YOU ARE READING
Smile Flower | Jihan
Fanfiction[based on the fictional Hanahaki disease] Joshua felt like he was going to die from the sheer stress of it all and he couldn't stop crying. He wasn't crying out of sadness, but out of anxiety, fear, and physical pain. He was scared out of his mind...
