good enough ; odesu

4.

jungsu and seungmin sat in front of each other on the soft grass under the huge tree. a small breeze was blowing and the sun was shining down on them, peeking through the clouds. the two sat in the shadow, not actually bothered by the sun. and the breeze made the weather even more perfect as it was not too hot nor too cold.

jungsu sat with his knees bent, back leaning against the tree, reading a book. he was so invested into what he was reading, like there was no one and nothing around him, like he was the only one in the world with his book.

seungmin on the other hand was lying on his stomach, having a sketchbook placed in front of him and holding a pencil in his hand. he had his head slightly tilted to the side, staring at the boy in front of him. then he nodded to himself and looking back down at the sketchbook, continued drawing.

it was like that most of the times. just being there for each other, keeping each other a silent company. seemed like they both were on their own. jungsu was reading a book and seungmin was drawing something. yet, they had to just be together, by each other's side.

the week had passed by pretty smoothly and it was now weekend. seungmin allowed himself to relax a little after the still tiring and overwhelming week and asked jungsu if they could go out somewhere. of course, his parents didn't know that he was going out with a friend and was actually spending some time in the park. he had told them he was going to the local library for a few hours or so, to study for upcoming test, which was a plain lie, since he was not going to the library, nor there was any test happening anytime soon.

when seemingly convincing his parents, he was quick to throw some necessary items in his favorite backpack, such as his very newly bought sketchbook (which he had bought the day he went to university for the first time after a week), a pencil, eraser and his phone of course.

he was glad his parents didn't check his backpack, and when they just questioned it, he just told them it were his books and notebooks placed there which he would most definitely need when getting ready for his in fact nonexistent upcoming test.

he was glad, everything went so well and even though he was pretty stressed during the whole week and didn't even feel like talking because of so much pressure, he felt relieved when he met jungsu, shared a warm brief hug with him and went into the park, finding the perfect spot for the two of them.

seungmin played with his pencil, lips slightly parted, as he looked up again at the elder, admiring him. he loved being like this. in silence, with jungsu by his side. he loved the other's company.

he was more than glad, that jungsu didn't start asking many questions during the whole week and didn't pressure him into telling him what was going on with him and what was bothering him. that week, which he spent in his bedroom, being locked there, affected seungmin more than he himself thought it would. he felt like just being unable to speak up and tell what was bothering him this much. he for a short second wanted so badly, to tell jungsu about it all. how tired he was because of this whole thing, how he felt so drained and weak because of his parents, how the university stressed him so much, how studies overwhelmed him and how the students there were never understanding enough to just leave him alone.

but he just couldn't say that. every time seungmin opened his mouth, trying to utter a word, it seemed like something huge was holding him back from speaking. it was as if no words were coming out of his mouth. he felt like if he said something, if he complained, his parents would somehow hear it, even though they weren't even there at that certain moment, everything would turn back to being a horrible nightmare again. his parents would scold him, yell at him for complaining and call him a ungrateful human being for even daring to think about something like that.