Confusion (Tom Kaulitz)

Don't recognize you

     WARNING!!

The last thing I remember from yesterday was that I cried myself to sleep in the cornern of the room. I stayed in that position the whole time and my hands were bruised from his tight grip. I stood up and walked to the big mirror only to see my hair all shaggy and my body covered in bruises and blood. On my cheek was a big wound from the phunches he gave me. I was horrified. How could he do this to me? What have I done to deserve this? A lot of quisetions were spinning in my head and I collapsed on the floor. Tears started running down my face as I mourned myself,sorrow and disappointment overwhelming me. All the feelings I developed for this man, for this criminal and abuser disappeared. I could never love someone who beats me around and rape me...even tho he didn't raped me but I was sure if I stayed for one more minute he would,he would break my innocence. I couldn't figure out what was with him. Why he changed like the weather. Maybe he had borderline personality? Or what? I wasn't good at these tipe of things, I only had depression after my grandmother died.

"Did you sleep well?" the voice starteled me. I jumped from astonishment and fear. I didn't even heard the door open and close. I didn't heard his heavy footsteps and his jeans rubbing together,like they always did. I didn't even looked at him, my back was facing him.

"You are a feisty girl,aren't you?" he said and I could hear him smirking. I could see his face even tho I didn't faced him. He had that seductive look and his eyebrow was raised. How could he act like nothing happened?

"Just leave me alone..I don't even want to see you." I said fear in my voice. I known this would make him angry.

He laughed evilly. Fucker. "That isn't an option Luna, you will see me every day from now on. Even if you like it or not." he said now a bit anger in his raspy voice.

I just sat there curled up in a ball. I needed to stay strong,to not burst out crying. This short time I was with him I learned that you can't be weak,you can't broke or cry. His world was a cruel one without mercy.

"Get dressed,you have 20 minutes." he said and walked out of the room leaving me there like a piece of shit once again.

I didn't had other choice, I needed to do as he said. If I obey him my chances of escaping increased.

Getting up my bones cracked with each movement and my whole body hurt. I walked to the bathroom,took a shower and washed myself completely. I wanted to wash off every  touch of his,I rubbed my body so hard that it started to hurt. I stepped out,my body red,and walked to the wardrobe to pick something out. I put on a hoodie and black jeans. My converse and some parfume. I brushed out my hair and braided it leaving two strands in the front. I put on some face cream and a bit of mascara. I put foundation all over my face even tho I don't really wear it and don't like it. I needed to cover up the big wound. After that I was ready to go whereever Tom wanted to go.

I walked down to the livingroom where Tom smoked a cigarette casually watching TV. He snapped his head at me,examining me from top to bottom and spoke up.

"Perfect." he said.

He walked up to me and put his hand on my shoulder guiding me out to the garage. He opened the door for me and than got in himself.

"Where are we going?" I asked in a low voice.

"I want to show you something." he said and with that we took off. This time the speed was insane. I looket at the speedometer to see 150,180. I was so scared. He never drove this fast,at least not with me. I started panicking and shut my eyes closed. I felt the sweat pouring down my forhead and I gripped my seat so hard that my knuckles turned white.

"SLOW DOWN!" I shouted at him. I felt like vomiting. This was fucking insane.

"You good?" he asked me and I opened my eyes. I looked at him with a fearful face and tried to speak but no words come out of my mouth.