Shadow (Jake Seresin)

Chapter 13

Ellie's POV:

The funeral right before the mission was one of the most intense things. I've been to a couple military funerals, but this one just hit my heart in a different way. That could be one of us in a few weeks. I hated thinking that, but with how serious this mission is, and how intense the training is, my anxiety couldn't help it. Not when all these people I've come to love and call my friends could be in that casket. Not when my best friend and my boyfriend could be in that casket. Not when I could be in that casket. 

This type of anxiety has never hit me before. You'd think I would be used to it by now. I was to buried in my thoughts when the 21 Gun Salute made me jump lightly. I saw Jake look at me out of the corner of his eye. I could tell he wanted to just hold me, and believe me, all I wanted to do was be held..but we didn't want to be affectionate in this moment. We had to be professionals. We watch Maverick stand over his casket. I can't imagine what he must be feeling. We watched the planes fly overhead, and TAPS began to play. I stared at Commander Kazansky's casket, tears welling up in my eyes. This funeral was so different than other military funerals, even though it had the exact same things happening. This one just felt way more personal, even though she didn't really know him personally. 

Afterwards, everyone gathered back at the Kazinsky's for food and drinks, and more of a celebration of his life. Everyone mingled with one another...everyone except Maverick. I saw him sitting on a bench by himself. I felt so bad for him. 

"Captain Mitchell." I made my presence known to him as I walked up to him. 

"Lieutenant Harrison. Had enough mingling?" He chuckled lightly as he offered her a seat.

"Mingling after a funeral isn't really a mood lifter for me." I chuckled lightly.

"Me neither, kid. Me neither" He smiled sadly at me.

"I never got to say how sorry I am for your loss. You have probably heard it a hundred times since, but I just wanted to tell you I am sorry." I told him.

"Thank you. It's appreciated. Must be hard seeing all this right before the mission?" He asked.

"Definitely. My mind keeps wandering." She looked off at all her friends mingling.

"You all are closely knit, I can tell. Especially you and Hangman over there." He pointed over to Jake. 

"We were never really affectionate around him. I underestimated how clever he is.

"You figured that out, huh?" I chuckled.

"You kidding? It could not be more obvious." He chuckled back. 

"That doesn't change our odds of getting picked to fly for the mission does it?" I asked.

He looked at me and then looked at Jake.

"I want to say yes, but that would be unfair to the both of you. I do not want to be responsible for potentially tearing you two apart, based off a judgement call. That is what I am thinking about." He told me.

That's understandable. 

"Understood, sir." I nodded.

"You two are remarkably good pilots. You all are. I'm impressed with all of you." He told me.

That made me smile.

"Thank you, sir. It's appreciated." I smiled at him."

"I think lover boy over there is waiting for you." He chuckled and pointed over to Jake. He was looking at the both of us. I smiled at him. 

"I hope your evening will be a little better than this, Captain." She smiled sadly and saluted him. He saluted her back and thanked her. 

I walked back to Jake as he waited by the drink table.