Stuck with you (BWWM)

Chapter 1

Why in the world does love have to hurt so damn bad? Everyone always talks about the joys of love, but they never mention the gut-wrenching pain that comes with it. It feels like someone's taken a sledgehammer to my chest, leaving me with an agonizing void that throbs in my heart. It hurts like hell. It really, truly does.

But I've got to find a way to let it all go. I have to, even though every fiber of my being screams against it. But wait, let me back up a bit and give you some context. This whole thing went down a few months ago in my room, and it's the moment that changed everything - the summer before junior year, before the world turned upside down.

"Hey, baby," I murmured to my boyfriend, a soft smile tugging at my lips. He wrapped his arms around me, his kiss warm and comforting.
"Hey," he replied, his gaze locking onto mine. Today marked our 11-month anniversary, and my history with Ben went all the way back to childhood. We finally crossed that line at the end of 9th grade and officially became a couple. But tonight, I had bigger plans - tonight, I wanted to say those three loaded words: I love you. I felt ready, like I was standing on the edge of something amazing, and I trusted him completely. What could possibly go wrong?

We retreated to my room, the familiar Disney Pixar movie queued up. We snuggled together, savoring those stolen moments that made everything feel just right. I love him, and today's the day he'll know it. Plus, I have more news to share: I got accepted into the Songwriting program in New York. I'm confident he'll be ecstatic for me.

"So, since it's our anniversary, I got you something," he announced, a teasing grin on his face.
"I've got something too, and trust me, it's big news," I replied with a twinkle in my eyes. I knew he'd love his gift.
"Okay then, you spill the beans first."
"But you said you had a surprise first, so spill it. Yeah, I know you're probably convinced that your gift is better and, oh, it requires your damn knees, so go ahead and share."

The banter continued, each of us nudging the other to go first. I eventually caved in, eager to end the playful back-and-forth. I pulled out my phone, opening a TikTok video I'd created - a song that expressed just how much he meant to me. His expression shifted as he watched, his eyes widening in surprise.

"See? I told you your gift would outshine mine," he chuckled, his eyes locking onto mine before he leaned in and captured my lips in a tender kiss. "Yours is probably amazing too, though," I playfully retorted.

"Sure, but before I reveal my 'amazing' gift, what's the news you've got?" he asked, a genuine smile gracing his lips. I took a deep breath, fully aware that what I was about to share could reshape everything.

"Remember how I applied for the NYC songwriting program?" I asked, and he nodded eagerly. "Well, I got in." His arms enveloped me in a tight embrace. "Gabi, that's incredible! You're going to shine, especially in your senior year."

"Senior year?"
"Yeah."
"Ben, that's not all. I'm going this summer, in just two weeks." His expression shifted, as if I'd dropped a bomb. This is where the tide began to turn.

"You're leaving for the whole summer?"
"Yes, the program runs until August. I'll be gone for a couple of months, but it's no big deal."

"No big deal? It's long-distance! You'll be more than 2,900 miles away!"
"I know that, but we can text and call every damn day. Nothing will change. You know I love you," I said, my voice firm and unwavering.

"You what?"
"I love you."
"That's a weighty word, you know. It's a huge commitment."
"So, do you not love me?" Frustration bubbled up inside me, and I began to stand up.
"I'm just saying maybe we're moving too fast. Perhaps we should, I don't know, take a break."

A break? Seriously? Just because I'm headed to another state, he wants to put everything on pause? I threw the door open.
"Fine, if that's what you want," I snapped, my voice trembling with emotion. He turned and walked away, leaving me standing there, fuming.

The boy I've poured my heart into doesn't even feel the same way. But that's okay, because he taught me something valuable: find someone who can handle commitment. But for now, it's time to focus on myself.

Now, two months have passed, and we're back at school for junior year. I've got a new boyfriend, a senior, and I'm happy. Nothing can wreck that happiness, not even Ben.